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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25172578">SI VIS AMARI, AMA.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/loeysbaby/pseuds/loeysbaby'>loeysbaby</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>EXO (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Demons, Angst, Chanyeol is whipped, Demon Deals, Demon Park Chanyeol, Demon Summoning, Denial of Feelings, Human Do Kyungsoo | D.O, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Mutual Pining, Smut, Top Park Chanyeol, lots of feelings, mentions of switching, sex with feelings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:15:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>27,633</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25172578</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/loeysbaby/pseuds/loeysbaby</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Kyungsoo is in love with a demon and it’s terrifying, loving someone.</p><p> </p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Park Chanyeol</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>130</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Oh Lovely Day Fest Round 2 (2020)</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>SI VIS AMARI, AMA.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Oh Lovely Day Fest: <strong>Prompt #LD094</strong></p><p> </p><p>Many, many thanks and kisses to my beta and frenemy L. Thank you for your never ending encouragement, for leading me in the right direction, for being super sweet, funny and oh gOD WE DID IT!!!!!! FINALLY!! AHHHHH</p><p>Thank you to the Mods for holding this round and for being patient and understanding~</p><p>The whole demon au is completely self indulgent, maybe it's not exactly what my dear prompter expected but their prompt gave me a lot of freedom, thank you for that!</p><p>Here is a translation of the title:</p><p> <em>If you wish to be loved, love.</em></p><p>Lastly, dear reader, please enjoy &lt;3</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>The first time Kyungsoo downloaded TikTok, he didn’t sleep for 2 days. </p><p> </p><p>And he summoned a demon. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo can’t say it was an accident because he knew exactly what he was doing, he just didn’t think it would <em> work.  </em></p><p> </p><p>Maybe the lack of sleep had finally gotten to him. It was a stupid downloading an addicting app before he could fix his sleeping schedule that had already been disturbed by mid-terms. </p><p> </p><p>His mom’s earlier text asking, no <em> demanding, </em>for him to come back home and transfer to the university over there probably had some effect in his decision making. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo ignores the text. </p><p> </p><p>It’s always the same shit, “are you <em> sure </em> you like boys?” and “it’s a phase, you just haven’t met a nice girl yet.” </p><p> </p><p>It’s annoying to say the least. And it hurts too, it fucking hurts that the one person whose opinion Kyungsoo really cared about, didn’t accept him. </p><p> </p><p>The college student sighs, looking up at the ceiling of his dorm room, lying on his bed. It was really dark and his eyesight is shit so Kyungsoo isn’t really looking for anything in particular. Just wondering if it was the right thing to come out to his mom as bisexual. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo sends the thought away quickly, into outer space to be burned by crepuscular rays.</p><p> </p><p>It didn’t matter, Kyungsoo had been grumpy and defensive, <em> miserable </em> all the time.</p><p> </p><p>He’s happier now, for sure. He doesn’t feel like he needs to hide or deny anymore. He feels more at ease and fully accepts himself. </p><p> </p><p>It would be nice if his mom could accept him too. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo sighs deeply, phone on his chest, still open on the TikTok app, thinking.</p><p> </p><p>Thinking about how his mom might refuse to help pay for his housing.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s financial aid had covered his tuition and left enough for his books but housing? Housing was disproportionately expensive and it frustrates Kyungsoo that even after taking out three loans, he was still short two grand. Per <em> semester </em>. </p><p> </p><p>Being raised by a single parent, Kyungsoo had hoped to receive a little bit more aid based on the income but that hadn’t been the case. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s too busy to get a job, his schedule packed with classes and study sessions and so it was his mother who tried to pay for the housing. Kyungsoo had gotten some small scholarships but they barely made a dent. </p><p> </p><p>His head hurts, thinking about this. </p><p> </p><p>But Kyungsoo <em> has </em> to think about it, he can’t sleep with all his thoughts running around, building up, filling the crevices of his mind, and making him anxious. </p><p> </p><p>If his mom refused to stop paying for housing then Kyungsoo would either apply for a private loan or apply for a job and just make it work. </p><p> </p><p>It would have been easier if Kyungsoo had been housed in a double, sharing the room with a roommate. It would have been significantly cheaper but he’s an idiot who didn’t realize he had pressed ‘single dorm’ instead of ‘double’.</p><p> </p><p>Despite having called the university and begged them to change it, it was no use. Kyungsoo was stuck with a single.  </p><p> </p><p>It’s nice having his own space and bathroom, Kyungsoo admits. Jongdae always tells him how his roommate comes in late and wakes him up. And he’s heard a lot of horror stories from Sehun about the community bathroom on the boys floor in one of the dorm buildings. </p><p> </p><p>Still, Kyungsoo can’t afford it. </p><p> </p><p>“Maybe I should get a sugar daddy.” Kyungsoo mutters to himself. </p><p> </p><p>The college student plays around with the idea. </p><p> </p><p>It’s not like he’s a virgin or shy about engaging in sex. It’s just… <em> sex </em>. Something that is natural to do and it hadn’t been a big deal for Kyungsoo to lose his virginity. </p><p> </p><p>It was during prom, senior year with his date. A little cliche, losing your virginity during prom in a broom closet. It certainly didn’t mean much, the girl, Fei was from another school and she seemed desperate to lose her v-card and well, Kyungsoo wasn’t exactly going to say no.</p><p> </p><p>It was a slightly awkward affair and there’s a significant difference between watching porn and fucking somone and Kyungsoo had been determined to not be labled a ‘minute man’. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s face scrunches up, thinking back on the experience, embarrassed, slightly mortified as images of that event ricocheted within his body. </p><p> </p><p>There had been no room and the itchy material of Fei’s dress had been in the back of his mind the whole time. Kyungsoo doesn’t even know how he did it, all he remembered was feeling overwhelming pleasure and Fei screaming to not cum inside. Kyungsoo ended up fingering her in the end but not exactly the best first time. </p><p> </p><p>But at least it had been done and Kyungsoo knew what to expect for the next time. </p><p> </p><p>There had been one more girl, Jieun. Cute and experienced. It was fun and casual and it lasted for about a month before Jieun said she wanted to date someone. A tall basketball player. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo took no offense of course. He has a weak spot for tall boys too. So he wished her luck and that was it. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo supposes the one time it <em> really </em> mattered, when it went a little more beyond fucking, was when it was his first time with a boy. </p><p> </p><p>The college student bit the inside of his cheek, reminiscing. </p><p> </p><p>Sex with Luhan had been exciting. New. </p><p> </p><p>Maybe a little boring. </p><p> </p><p>Luhan never wanted to top and Kyungsoo wanted to see how it would feel, having a dick inside of him. Being top was fun and Kyungsoo’s personality was one where he enjoyed being in charge, liked being strong and demanding in a quiet manner. But Kyungsoo still wanted to try being a bottom, he felt like he shouldn’t close the door before he had a chance to look inside. </p><p> </p><p>In the end, Luhan wanted <em> more </em> from Kyungsoo and Kyungsoo couldn’t give it to him. </p><p> </p><p>At the time, it felt as though a relationship between them wouldn’t work out. He isn’t the type to succumb to passion and the passion was lacking a little between them. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo had liked Luhan but not the way Luhan had liked him. </p><p> </p><p>It was a little messy breaking it off and Luhan makes a very obvious effort to avoid Kyungsoo whenever they see each other around campus. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo thinks back to his original idea of becoming a sugar baby. </p><p> </p><p>Most likely a sugar daddy will want Kyungsoo to bottom and Kyungsoo isn’t too fond at losing his bottom virginity like that. Besides, how will he even look for one? He’s probably stupid enough to get scammed. </p><p> </p><p>So, the sugar daddy idea is off the table then. </p><p> </p><p>“I could sell my liver,” Kyungsoo says out loud, if only to hear himself talk. “No wait, is it the kidney?” </p><p> </p><p>Which one is it again? </p><p> </p><p>The college student supposes it doesn’t really matter, whichever one will give him the most money is the right answer. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo decides to do a little research for the fun of it. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo brings his phone close to his face, the bright screen burning his eyes but his eyesight was already bad so what difference would it make to dim the brightness? </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo unlocks his phone (072283, Zuko’s birthday) and glares at his mom’s text for a moment before opening his safari. </p><p> </p><p>He uses the incognito mode, not wanting to end up on the FBI’s radar or something. Kyungsoo glances up at the small camera of his phone, briefly wondering if his FBI agent would report him. Bastard. After everything they’ve been through together.</p><p> </p><p> A list of relevant websites popped up. </p><p> </p><p>How to donate your kidney: 12 steps (with pictures) - wikiHow</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo raises an eyebrow, about to click on the link but deciding against it. He wanted to make <em> money </em> off of his organ, he’s not about to give away his precious kidney. Call him an asshole, but Kyungsoo needs cold hard cash.  </p><p> </p><p>He scrolls down a little.</p><p> </p><p>How to Sell Body Parts for Profit - Business Insider</p><p> </p><p>Preview:<em> Kidneys can be sold for as much as $10,000 a pop and it's estimated that organ trafficking accounts for roughly five to 10 percent of all the kidney ... </em></p><p> </p><p>Ten grand? Now that sounds promising and at the low cost of just one kidney. </p><p> </p><p>“Count me in,” Kyungsoo mutters as he clicks on the link, hoping the link is legitimate and won’t give his phone a virus. </p><p> </p><p>After skimming the article, Kyungsoo huffs in frustration.</p><p> </p><p>The article isn’t  particularly useful, only reporting on information instead of giving an actual list of things to do. Kyungsoo clicks on another link but the article has similar content. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo supposes he’ll have to go on the dark web at this rate and that is <em> not </em> something he wants to do. </p><p> </p><p>He browses a little more, glancing at the glaring time displayed on the corner of his screen. 2 AM. It doesn’t really matter, tomorrow is Saturday. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo sees that sperm banks were an option and he plays with the idea a little bit. </p><p> </p><p>He meets all the requirements and he lives in a huge and well known city, there’s bound to be a sperm bank near. </p><p> </p><p>Yet, the thought of potentially having kids he would never know about isn’t something Kyungsoo could wrap his head around. At this point in his life, he hasn’t given children any thought, simply because he doesn’t have a partner nor does he have an overwhelming desire to become a father. </p><p> </p><p>Maybe it’s because of his daddy issues but Kyungsoo has a rather strong urge to be present in his children’s lives. Apparently, he’s more sentimental than what he gives himself credit for. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo sighs. This is going nowhere, he’s back to the traditional ways of getting some money. </p><p> </p><p>Still, Kyungsoo figures he should at least look up some flights to South Korea. If he’s going to try to illegally sell his organs, he’ll be more comfortable doing it in a familiar country that is <em> not </em> the United States. Kyungsoo was born here but he has an attachment to his mom’s home country. </p><p> </p><p>Typing in flights and random dates for departure, Kyungsoo quickly got an estimate for a two way ticket. </p><p> </p><p>And it’s <em>not </em> worth flying all the way over there. Besides, Kyungsoo remembers hearing something from his mom about some virus outbreak over there. </p><p> </p><p>Slightly dejected, Kyungsoo closes his browser and opens up the Tiktok app. </p><p> </p><p>It wasn’t a big disheartening blow anyway, it wasn’t like he was <em> actually </em> doing to go through with it. At least Kyungsoo can say he considered selling his organs, for the clout.</p><p> </p><p>He scrolls through the app mindlessly, lips caving in for a smile here and there, laughing once or twice. </p><p> </p><p>Around three am, Kyungsoo’s eyes start to feel heavy and droopy. His consciousness ebbed away, his mind teetering on a metaphorical cliff, ready to go into a free fall, into the swaying, shimmery promise of a dream.  </p><p> </p><p><em> Just one more, </em> Kyungsoo thinks, swiping up. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> How to summon a demon, quick and easy!  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s eyes widen, mind pulled back from the cliff, back to a full consciousness. He didn’t expect a video like this to come up on his feed. The video’s he got were normally cute animal videos, cooking and Gen Z humor. </p><p> </p><p>Still, what’s the harm anyway? Kyungsoo doesn’t believe in stuff like that nor does he think the video is going to be serious. It’s probably just a parody about James Charles.</p><p> </p><p>The college student settles back into his pillow, restarting the video.</p><p> </p><p>A cute, upbeat music starts playing in the background. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>
  <b>How to summon a demon, quick and easy! </b>
</p><p> </p><p>First, let's talk about the pros and cons of summoning a demon</p><p> </p><p>Pros: you have someone to hang out with and you can get everything you’ve ever wanted! Also, if you’re looking for a partner, a demon is good because they’ve signed a contract to serve Lucifer of all eternity so they aren’t afraid of commitment! (•̀ᴗ•́)و ̑̑</p><p> </p><p>Cons: your soul will be eaten and you will be dragged to hell.</p><p> </p><p>Now, Lucifer himself won’t answer your summons, he’s very busy after all so expect a subordinate, like an assistant manager. Don’t worry, they will still be evil so you’ll definitely get an authentic experience.</p><p> </p><p>Oh shit, I’m running out of time, uhhhh I’ll make a part two!! ( ･ᴗ･̥̥̥ )</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>The video ends, restarting to the beginning. Kyungsoo pauses the video, pressing on the profile and scrolling through for part two, curious to see how it ends. </p><p> </p><p>He clicks on the video and the same, upbeat music was heard.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>
  <b>How to summon a demon, part two!</b>
</p>
<table>
<tbody>
<tr>
<td>
<br/>

<p>Okay so let’s just get into it!</p>
<br/>

<p>You’ll need a summoning spell, any will work, just look one up! I’ll link my favorite one in the comments ꒰⑅•ᴗ•⑅꒱</p>
<br/>

<p>A silver bowl and a stone blade, I suggest you go to Walmart or TJ Maxx, they have good prices! </p>
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<p>Salt, any kind is fine! </p>
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<p>Candles made from nectar.</p>
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<p>And of course you’ll need to draw a pentagram but here’s the catch - it has to be drawn from the blood of a virgin. Plain, non-virgin blood works okay as well but you have a lower chance of getting a response. </p>
<br/>

<p>Also, this summoning ritual isn’t for a specific kind of demon, so really there is no guarantee on which type of demon you’ll be met with! Hopefully they’re nice enough to listen to your demands without consuming your soul (◡‿◡✿)</p>
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<p>Okay so I’ll do a part three byeeeee (人 •͈ᴗ•͈)</p>
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<p>Kyungsoo scrolls up to the next video of the accounts feed, completely invested at this point. He wants to see if this person will actually summon a demon or if they were just doing this for the views. </p>
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<p><b>How to summon a demon, part three!</b></p>
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<p>Okay now for the part you’ve been waiting for!</p>
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<p>But first– location. It’s best to summon in a place where you are the most comfortable and familiar with, a place that carries most of your personal energy. I would suggest your bedroom!</p>
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<p>Alright so, step one: draw a pentagram on the floor with blood and don’t be cheap with the blood, use as much as possible!</p>
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<p>Step two: place the nectar based candles at each star point that meets the circle, so five candles. </p>
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<p>Step three: place salt into the silver bowl and mix it with a little bit of water. </p>
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<p>Step four: dip the stone blade into the salt-water. Make a line with the knife where you would like to contain the demon. Everything behind the pentagram can be accessed by the demon, meaning the demon can walk freely in that area. By dragging the knife across the floor, you’ll be able to create a barrier that the demon can not cross over. </p>
<br/>

<p>Step five: dump out the salt-water and refill the silver bowl with salt. It’s important to keep the silver bowl because, that’s what I read online and well I’ve never tried anything different. If you use another type of bowl and it works, let me know in the comments! (✿╹◡╹)</p>
<br/>

<p>Step six: throw the salt onto the pentagram as you chat your summoning spell.</p>
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<p>That’s it! Good luck ❀.(*´◡`*)❀</p>
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<p>Kyungsoo pauses the video. </p>
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<p>That was… interesting. </p>
<br/>

<p>The idea of summoning a demon is odd and a little riveting. A part of Kyungsoo wants to try it out, but the part of him that is in accordance with reason and logic knew he would never do it. </p>
<br/>

<p>It wouldn’t work, any one with common sense would realize that. One doesn’t just <em>summon</em> a fucking demon, as if demons even existed in the first place! If anything, Kyungsoo would just end up wasting money he doesn’t even have. Besides, where would he get that much blood? </p>
<br/>

<p>Kyungsoo locks his phone, turning around to place it on his night stand, not bothering to charge it. He flips on his back, fully intending to go to sleep but once again, his thoughts pranced around. </p>
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<p>If Kyungsoo is as indifferent as he likes to think he is, he would give this summoning business a shot. </p>
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<p>But he’s scared. </p>
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<p>Kyungsoo was raised in the church and even though it’s been a couple of years since he put his foot down and refused to attend services, the whole Heaven and Hell theology has stuck with him. </p>
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<p>Kissing and fucking boys is fine but Kyungsoo draws the line at satanic rituals. </p>
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<p>Would his mother be proud of him? Not fully of course, because of the whole, kissing and fucking boys thing, but maybe sixty percent proud? It’s a high percentage, Kyungsoo knows, but refraining from participating in satanic rituals is a pretty big deal. </p>
<br/>

<p>Also, the whole “sacrificing your soul” thing isn’t exactly encouraging Kyungsoo to jump at the opportunity to summon any Hell-bound creature. </p>
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<p>Kyungsoo sighs, once again staring in the dark abyss that is his bedroom ceiling. </p>
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<p>He wishes he didn’t care so much, about his mom’s opinion. Wished he had the courage to cut her off but well, he loves her. And when someone’s been raised by one parent their whole life, it’s hard to let go. </p>
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<p><em>Hopefully she’ll come around, </em>Kyungsoo thinks, before closing his eyes and allowing his mind to fall into the shimmery abyss of sleep. </p>
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<p>“What am I <em>doing</em>?” Kyungsoo asks himself again. </p>
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<p>He bites the inside of his cheek, staring at the far right corner in his dorm, rethinking everything as he takes in the big pentagram that was drawn on the hard, wooden floor. </p>
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<p>The paint he bought said it was supposed to be easily washed away and Kyungsoo really hopes that's true, or else he’s going to get a hefty fine from the housing office. </p>
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<p>Explaining why he drew a pentagram in the first place wasn’t as concerning as being charged. </p>
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<p>Well, if this ends up working, Kyungsoo could ask his newly summoned demon to clear it out right? His soul in exchange for some house cleaning. </p>
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<p>Kyungsoo sighs, deep and heavy. </p>
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<p>“Well, I can’t back out now.” he mutters as he walks towards the daunting symbol on the floor, flicks the lighter in his hand to light up the nectar scented candles placed around the circle. </p>
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<p>Drawing the pentagram was an intimidating task, a little unnerving. Kyungsoo had used red paint to make it more visible and also to hide the lack of blood used.</p>
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<p>Kyungsoo had pricked his finger with a knife, too scared to try another place on his body. After a few drops of blood were in the silver bowl (it was four dollars, a steal), Kyungsoo had started to feel light-headed. And it had been very obvious that it was not enough to draw <em>anything</em> so Kyungsoo mixed it with some water, to increase the quantity of it. </p>
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<p>And then he decided to fuck it and added red food dye. </p>
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<p><em>Technically</em>, he drew the pentagram with blood. </p>
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<p><em>What does it matter anyway? </em>Kyungsoo thinks, lighting the last candle. </p>
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<p>It’s not like he has high hopes of this working. </p>
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<p>There are two reasons why he’s doing this: because he’s curious and as a fuck you to his mom.</p>
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<p>Kyungsoo clenches his jaw, his lips pressed into a tense line. He stands back up and grabs the clean silver bowl from his small kitchen counter and fills it up with salt. </p>
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<p>The morning had been a wonderful affair.</p>
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<p>Kyungsoo woke up just before noon, giving him the small victory of calling his cereal <em>breakfast</em> instead of an <em>early afternoon snack</em>.</p>
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<p>Then he rewatched The Beach™ episode from Avatar, the Last Airbender, on a semi-illegal website, the one where Zuko takes off his shirt and doves fly by. As always, It had been a riveting experience. </p>
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<p>And then his mom had called. </p>
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<p>Kyungsoo dumps a little bit of water into the silver bowl from his pitcher, mixing it together, the corners of his mouth tightening as he replays the conversation.</p>
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<p>It had started out as it usually does.</p>
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<p>How are you? How’s school coming? Any big assignments coming up? Are you eating well? When are you coming home? What, I just want to know! Well, we could tour the local university– it’s just a <em>suggestion</em> Kyungsoo, no need to get so defensive. </p>
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<p>And then:</p>
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<p>I’m just really worried okay? Who knows what or who is influencing you to do <em>things</em>. Bad things. You’re a good boy Kyungsoo, it’s just a phase–</p>
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<p>“It’s <em>not</em> a phase mom,” Kyungsoo had said, hands clutching his phone tightly, molding his skin and bones around the hard frame as irritation pricked at his skin. </p>
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<p>“This is who I am and–” Kyungsoo bit the inside of his cheek, heart racing, trying to gather up his courage. “And it really bothers me that you aren’t being supportive and I’m trying my best to– to give you space but it feels like you’re not making any effort at <em>all</em>–”</p>
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<p>“You already know how I feel, what more is there to say?”</p>
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<p>Kyungsoo fell quiet, absorbed by this plummeting feeling within him, like his soul was falling down, right into the ground, melting from the heat of the Earth’s core and from the stinging rejection and hurt. </p>
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<p>“So, that’s it?” Kyungsoo asked with quiet rage. “You’re just not going to try? You’re just going to do me like this?”</p>
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<p>“What about me?” His mom snapped. “Have you ever stopped to think about what <em>you’re </em>putting <em>me</em> through? No, of course not because you’re so selfish!”</p>
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<p>Kyungsoo scoffed, so <em>this</em> is how it’s going to be? Fine. </p>
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<p>“You have <em>no</em> right to talk about being selfish,” Kyungsoo said, voice tight. His mom tried to talk over him but Kyungsoo barreled on. “I was fucking miserable and scared and I really needed you, I <em>still</em> need you but if you’re not going to step up then I’ll learn to live without you.”</p>
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<p>“What are you saying?” his mom laughed. “What? You’re going to move out? You can’t do anything on your own! You have no idea how to support yourself! Nor do you have the money!”</p>
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<p>“I’ll figure it out,” Kyungsoo gritted out. “And one more thing– college didn’t make me like guys, no one is forcing me to do <em>anything.</em> I’ve known I’m bi for a long time and I only recently told you because I was scared of your reaction and now you’re proving my fear right.”</p>
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<p>And then Kyungsoo hung up. </p>
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<p>It hit him a few minutes later the gravity of his situation. </p>
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<p>And difficult situations required solutions. <em>Any</em> solutions.</p>
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<p>At first, Kyungsoo killed the idea as soon as it’s little foot took a step inside his mind. Didn’t even give a time to take a breath or two.</p>
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<p> But then he revived it, nurtured it, played with it until it was all Kyungsoo would think of. </p>
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<p>Summoning a demon is extreme. But Kyungsoo figures, since he might be homeless soon, he really doesn’t have anything to lose. </p>
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<p>Besides, the probability ratio of it <em>actually working</em> is very, very low. <br/>
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</p>

<p> </p>

<p> </p>

<p> </p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>

<p> </p>

<p> </p>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table><p>“<em> Oh fuck. Fuck, fuck! </em>” Kyungsoo whispers under his breath, eyes wide, heart convulsing so violently, threatening to knock out one of Kyungsoo’s lungs. It seems that even without his heart's help, Kyungsoo’s struggling to breathe either way. </p><p> </p><p>There’s a cloud of smoke above the center of the pentagram, coming from the tiny flames from the candles but the way the smoke was suspended was unnatural. It expands in what could have been seconds but it feels like hours to Kyungsoo, who’s shell shocked. </p><p> </p><p>He expects the smoke to drift out of the pentagram but it merely continues to grow and grow, until they’re enough to completely cover a person.</p><p> </p><p>For a very brief moment, Kyungsoo feels concerned about the smoke alarm going off but that quickly becomes insignificant, a very trivial problem because the tiny flames from the candles suddenly swell up, and there are raging fires from five sources in Kyungsoo’s room.</p><p> </p><p>“Holy shit!” Kyungsoo curses loudly, dropping his phone to the floor from the shock. He takes a step back, feeling the warmth creeping up on him. </p><p> </p><p>The fires are somehow controlled but not at the same time. They extend upward, eventually touching the ceiling and Kyungsoo–</p><p> </p><p>Well Kyungsoo’s scared shitless but <em> fuck </em> he’s going to be charged for the burn marks on the ceiling. </p><p> </p><p>He cries out when the fire starts moving out and Kyungsoo takes steps back, scrambling quick like his fearful heart, his legs start shaking </p><p> </p><p>and a severe, anxious feeling penetrates Kyungsoo’s heart, cracking it open, slithering down his spine and up his throat and Kyungsoo feels so much dread and terror and the only thing he can think is <em>what the </em> <b> <em>fuck</em> </b> <em> did I do? </em></p><p> </p><p>The fire moves towards Kyungsoo, rapidly, and the poor human has nowhere to go, he’s trapped in this room, being pushed against the wall. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo stares at the fire, with rapid breaths and he <em> swears </em> he can feel the fire teasing him, almost as if it wants to caress his face, it’s <em>that </em> close. </p><p> </p><p>It didn’t feel as hot as how Kyungsoo’s instincts were telling him fire should feel at this proximity but Kyungsoo isn’t complaining. He has absolutely no desire to burn his face off. </p><p> </p><p>However, Kyungsoo is still very much frightened, terror is grabbing the base of his spine and twisting it in it’s fist and it occurs to him that he might die here. In his expensive dorm, from a fire. </p><p> </p><p>And while the thought of dying absolutely petrified Kyungsoo, at least he won’t die a virgin. </p><p> </p><p><em> What is wrong with me? </em> Kyungsoo thinks. How can he be thinking about sex <em> right now </em>? </p><p> </p><p>Then, the fire is seemingly pulled back and in the approximately 2.5 seconds it takes to inhale, the fire is back to where it was originally. Hovering over the pentagram, crackling but still too big and very obviously supernatural. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo briefly registers that none of his possessions seem to be burned but the relief is trampled by anticipation. </p><p> </p><p>Because surely this means that it worked right?</p><p> </p><p>Everything, the red food dye mixed with water, the cheap candles, the short, Latin summoning spell that Kyungsoo had completely butchered– it all worked.</p><p> </p><p>Is–</p><p> </p><p>Is he really going to be face to face with a fucking <em> demon</em>?</p><p> </p><p>There is a short stillness in which the fire stops moving, and there’s a piercing silence and Kyungsoo’s breathing rings in his ears, deafening and overwhelming. </p><p> </p><p>Then the fire is gone.</p><p> </p><p>And a tall, pink haired man stands in the center of the summoning circle. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Dressed in tight-fitting, black synthetic leather pants and jacket with a black and white striped turtleneck, the man casually glances around Kyungsoo’s bedroom. </p><p> </p><p>Then he moves his gaze to Kyungsoo.</p><p> </p><p>There’s something about the way he nonchalantly looks at Kyungsoo up and down. Heavy and dark and it makes Kyungsoo’s heart, his entire being <em> pulsate </em>, threatening to break apart and become a whisper of what it once was. </p><p> </p><p>His eyes meet Kyungsoo’s.</p><p> </p><p>One blue. One white. </p><p> </p><p>The scars on his face brought more attention to the heterochromia. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo feels his heart jerk in his throat and he struggles to take in a breath and then he’s making a weird gasping sound and Kyungsoo feels his face become warm, embarrassed. </p><p> </p><p>Yes, breathing is important but does he have to make a fool out of himself in front of this man? This tall, handsome, captivating, hot, <em> tall, </em>man.</p><p> </p><p><em> No </em> , Kyungsoo corrects himself. <em> He isn’t a man. He’s a demon. </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> A hot, tall demon.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The demon smiles. </p><p> </p><p>It’s a sinister, crooked smile, the kind that is <em> evil </em> to its core but it’s laced with a soft, boyish charm and Kyungsoo isn’t sure as to why he hasn’t evaporated into nothingness yet. </p><p> </p><p>“How can I help you?” he asks with a dark, rich, deep voice. The kind of voice that causes honey to splash onto Kyungsoo’s soul and there’s a slight burn to it. A warning.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> God help him. </em>
</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“Um.” Kyungsoo says out loud. He cringes internally, like yeah, he’s shocked by the fucking <em> hot demon </em> standing in the corner of his bedroom but couldn’t he have said something more eloquent?</p><p> </p><p>The pink haired demon looks amused.</p><p> </p><p>And Kyungsoo gets the feeling that he is being ridiculed and mocked. It leaves a nasty taste and so he pulls himself together.</p><p> </p><p>“What’s–” Kyungsoo feels his voice shaking so he tries to swallow down the terror lodged in his throat and tries again. “What’s your name?”</p><p> </p><p>“Why?” The demon asks, the small smile still playing on his lips. </p><p> </p><p>“Because–” Kyungsoo scrambles for a valid answer. “Because it’s polite.” </p><p> </p><p>The demon, for some reason, is very much entertained by Kyungsoo’s reasoning. </p><p> </p><p>And Kyungsoo is starting to get a little irritated. It’s as if he isn’t being taken seriously and is only there for the demon’s entertainment when it’s the <em> demon </em> who should be entertaining Kyungsoo. </p><p> </p><p>With this thought, Kyungsoo feels his fear start to cease. </p><p> </p><p>“My name is Chanyeøl.”</p><p> </p><p>“Chan– what?” It sounded like gibberish to Kyungsoo, an odd pronunciation to the tongue. </p><p> </p><p>The demon looks at Kyungsoo in an incredulous manner. </p><p> </p><p>“Chan-<em> yeøl. </em>” the pink haired man emphasizes. </p><p> </p><p>“Spell it out for me,” Kyungsoo says and at this point, even though he’s still frightened, it dimmed significantly. </p><p> </p><p>Maybe it’s because of the nature of the conversation. </p><p> </p><p>It’s a very genuine question, Kyungsoo feels like it’s rude to mispronounce someone’s name and not make an effort to say it properly. It’s happened to him before and he’s been irritated by it. Seriously, how hard is it to pronounce <em> Kyungsoo </em>? </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeøl sighs. “Look it’s really not that hard.”</p><p> </p><p>“Give me a break,” Kyungsoo defensively replies. “I have no experience with whatever demon language you’re using. I’m just trying to be polite.”</p><p> </p><p>“By <em> arguing </em> with me?”</p><p> </p><p>“By trying to pronounce your name correctly,” Kyungsoo answers. “You deserve that.” </p><p> </p><p> <em> Where is all this confidence coming from? </em></p><p> </p><p>The demon looks at Kyungsoo for a moment, long enough to make Kyungsoo panic a little and wonder if he went too far. Do demons have short tempers? </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeøl’s plush lips twirl up into a half-smile.</p><p> </p><p>It strikes Kyungsoo, causing his heart to jump a little and for one infant second, it was fluttered.</p><p> </p><p>Then the smile is gone, as the demon once again emphasizes his name, in his low, honey tone voice. “Chan-<em> yeøl. </em>” </p><p> </p><p>“Chan–” Kyungsoo struggles and then it hits him. “Wait do you mean Chan<em> -yeol? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeøl blinks. “Close enough.”</p><p> </p><p>And with Chanyeøl’s reassurance, it becomes good enough for Kyungsoo too.  </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“What’s your name?” Chanyeol asks with a certain tilt to his lips.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s Kyungsoo.” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol breathes out Kyungsoo’s name. Repeats it, like the word amuses him, delights him  somehow, as he tests the weight of the name on his tongue. </p><p> </p><p>And Kyungsoo can no longer keep up the pretense that he isn’t attracted to Chanyeol. </p><p> </p><p>It feels liberating somehow. </p><p> </p><p>“Come here.” </p><p> </p><p>“Why?” Kyungsoo struggles to keep his mind from wandering off but it’s a very difficult thing.</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t you think it’s straining talking across the room?” Chanyeol asks, a single strand of pink hair covering his forehead. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo doesn’t mind it. At<em> all. </em></p><p> </p><p>Yes, he’s attracted to this Hell-bound creature but he’s not going to drop all of his defenses. He has to keep a safe distance, he has enough common sense to know that. </p><p> </p><p>“I think I’m fine here,” Kyungsoo states. </p><p> </p><p>“I won’t hurt you,” Chanyeol says and Kyungsoo finds himself wanting to believe the sincerity wrapped up in a pretty manner around Chanyeol’s deep voice is real. </p><p> </p><p>“You almost did. With the fire.” It had to be Chanyeol controlling the fire, it was the only explanation for the way the flames seemed to caress his face earlier. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol shrugs a little. “It’s kind of my signature move.” </p><p> </p><p>“It’s an asshole move,” Kyungsoo points out, eyes widening when he realized what he said. </p><p> </p><p>His words earned him a lopsided smile, illuminating Chanyeol’s face, illuminating Kyungsoo’s heart a little.  </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo thinks he hears a small laugh. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m sorry, I’ll keep that in mind for when I’m summoned again.”</p><p> </p><p>“Again?” Kyungsoo echoes. He’s then reminded of the extremity of his current situation.</p><p> </p><p>And the situation is that he has summoned a demon, a very handsome demon, like <em> really </em> handsome, with a strong jawline and cute ears and round eyes and broad shoulders (Oh God, is Kyungsoo simping right now?) and he summoned said demon with a TikTok.</p><p> </p><p>A fucking<em> TikTok. </em></p><p> </p><p>But more importantly, there had been a warning that summoning a demon meant paying with one's soul. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s eyes widen. Terror pricked him.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol, on the other hand, looks genuinely confused. “I mean, there aren’t any requirements that we have to meet once a month or something like that but I figured one summoning won’t be enough? You’re giving me your soul, I figured you’d like to reap the benefits as much as possible right? Humans are like that.”</p><p> </p><p>Okay, Kyungsoo is in a <em> very </em> difficult situation right now but– “Did you just make a snide remark? How rude.”</p><p> </p><p>“What?” Chanyeol deadpans. He looks at Kyungsoo, eyebrows scrunched up in a cute manner. And then his eyes light up, as understanding settles within them, like freshly fallen snow. “Oh I get it now.”</p><p> </p><p>“Get <em> what?” </em> Kyungsoo asks, a little anxious, getting the urge to fidget. </p><p> </p><p>“When you’re in a hard situation, you tend to focus on smaller, insignificant things to get your mind off of it.” Chanyeol’s cool eyes flickered a little. “Through humor and sarcasm.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo snorts. “So you’re a demonic psychiatrist?”</p><p> </p><p>And then Kyungsoo realizes Chanyeol is right. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol smiles, like he knows what's going on inside of Kyngsoo’s head. At this point, Kyungsoo wouldn’t be surprised if Chanyeol can do mind reading.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not a psychiatrist,” The demon states. “I’m just <em> really </em> good at reading people.” He shrugs, shoulders, big and broad. “Part of the job.”</p><p> </p><p>“So you call your existence a job?” Kyungsoo pointed out, trying to avoid the topic of his soul from coming up. He still wants to keep it, despite not giving it much thought his whole life. </p><p> </p><p>“I’d rather be running errands than suffer like the damned,” Chanyeol pointed out, shifting in place. Kyungsoo gets the feeling Chanyeol wants to step out of the pentagram.</p><p> </p><p>“Do you like being a demon?” Kyungsoo asks, again, not because he’s particularly interested, but because he wants to keep his soul. Maybe Chanyeol is a nice demon?</p><p> </p><p>“It’s all I’ve ever known,” Chanyeol replies. And then his lips curled up slightly. “It’s fun sometimes. Nothing beats the thrill of taking someone’s soul.”</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Kyungsoo blinks. </p><p> </p><p>He realizes that Chanyeol knew the little game Kyungsoo was trying to play and he led Kyungsoo on. It’s kind of admirable. </p><p> </p><p>And then, Kyungsoo’s heart picks up, nervous and terrified and he tries to swallow because his mouth grew dry all of a sudden but it feels like acid is running down the back of his throat. </p><p> </p><p>“<em> What </em>?” Kyungsoo chokes out.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p> </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>"Give me your soul as payment." Chanyeol states, clearly delighted by the turn of events, of seeing Kyungsoo look uncomfortable.</p><p> </p><p> Kyungsoo takes it back, he doesn’t admire this being. Chanyeol is an asshole. </p><p> </p><p>He breathes in, and decides to deal with this like how he deals with pretty much everything in his life.  </p><p> </p><p>"Sorry I already gave it away to my college debts." Kyungsoo says, casually, trying to hide the fact that he's scared shitless.</p><p> </p><p>"What?" Chanyeol asks, looking genuinely shocked, as if he hadn’t pointed out Kyungsoo’s whole coping mechanism minutes ago. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo shrugs. "Tuition is cheap but housing? I was actually considering selling my kidney, I looked up flights and everything."</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol tilts his head to the side, concentrating on something, cool eyes never leaving Kyungsoo’s face. Kyungsoo breaks eye contact. </p><p> </p><p>Is this the part where Chanyeol calls out Kyungsoo’s bullshit and takes his soul? Kyungsoo bites inside of his cheek.</p><p> </p><p>“You still have both kidneys,” the demon states.</p><p> </p><p>So, Chanyeol is willing to bite. </p><p> </p><p>“Hence the, <em> I sold my soul to college debts, </em> part.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo can’t believe he’s trying to bargain for his soul. </p><p> </p><p>“So you want money?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes actually.” </p><p> </p><p>Why did he say that? Oh fuck he’s so screwed. He just agreed to a transaction didn’t he? </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo internally panics, thinking of something to say. “That would help a lot.” He fumbles out, “But I can't give my soul away, sorry.”</p><p> </p><p>“You agreed the moment you decided to summon me,” Chanyeol points out, a glimmer in his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>He’s <em> enjoying </em> this.  </p><p> </p><p>And it annoys Kyungsoo so much, irks him how careless and casual Chanyeol is regarding Kyungsoo’s life. But really, what he can expect from a demon?</p><p> </p><p>“It wasn’t supposed to work!” Kyungsoo says, trying to keep calm but honestly he’s really freaking out here. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol has the audacity to roll his eyes. “Well obviously it worked, I’m here aren’t I?”</p><p> </p><p>“Unfortunately.” Kyungsoo mutters under his breath.</p><p> </p><p>“I heard that.”</p><p> </p><p>“Good!” Kyungsoo says, purposefully making his voice louder. “Now <em> leave </em>.”</p><p> </p><p>“I can’t just <em> leave </em> !” Chanyeol points to the pentagram underneath his feet. “ <em> You </em> summoned <em> me, </em>I’m bound to you until I collect your soul!”</p><p> </p><p>“Well, I’m not going to just <em>hand</em> <em>over</em> my soul!” Kyungsoo argues, mind processing everything Chanyeol just said.   </p><p> </p><p>“Then I’m not leaving!” Chanyeol argues back, crossing his arms across his chest. </p><p> </p><p>“Then <em> I </em> am!” And Kyungsoo starts to walk toward his bedroom door, to his left. </p><p> </p><p>He’s surprised that Chanyeol isn’t protesting but what can Chanyeol do? He can’t leave the pentagram, he used the stone knife and everything. </p><p> </p><p>It turns out, Chanyeol knew not to waste his breath. </p><p> </p><p>“What the<em> fuck?” </em> Kyungsoo mutters, hand around the door handle. He tries to pull the handle down, so he can walk out but his body isn’t etting him. Anxiety creeps up his spine, filling in the empty spaces. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo turns around to face Chanyeol, frantic, “What’s going on?” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol sighs, like he’s talking to a child. “I told you, I’m bound to you, you can’t go anywhere without me trailing after you, at least until I collect your soul.”</p><p> </p><p><em> “What? </em>” Kyungsoo shrieks, fully facing Chanyeol, so many emotions filling him, threatening to drown him in it’s waves, enveloping his existence. It’s unnerving. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo stares at the demon, takes in the pink hair, the tall structure, and he becomes agitated. Is this Hell-bound going to follow him around then? <em> Everywhere? </em></p><p> </p><p>“If it worries you so much,” Chanyeol speaks, “then let me cultivate your soul and we can be on our merry way. Well at least <em> I </em> can.”</p><p> </p><p>“How many times have you done this?” Kyungsoo shakily asks, ignoring the obvious implication from Chanyeol’s last words. </p><p> </p><p>“A handful of times,” Chanyeol replies. “I don’t normally answer a summons, I’ve kind of <em> graduated </em> from that phase of being a demon.”</p><p> </p><p>“Then why did you answer mine?” Kyungsoo asks quietly. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol glances at Kyungsoo up and down. He shrugs, once again bringing Kyungsoo’s attention to the broad shoulders. “I was curious. No one’s ever used red food dye before.”</p><p> </p><p>“I-” Kyungsoo looks at Chanyeol in disbelief. “It was a <em> joke </em>! It wasn’t meant to be taken seriously! It wasn’t supposed to work!”</p><p> </p><p>“It was still a summoning,” Chanyeol insists. “Now you have to pay up.”</p><p> </p><p>“No!” Kyungsoo says firmly, his heart threatening to explode from fear. What will happen if he continues to be stubborn? Probably the same outcome if he gives up his soul. Death. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol sighs, bringing a hand to his face, pinching his nose bridge, clenching his jaw. The actions caused familiar lust to pool in Kyungsoo’s abdomen. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo ignores it, this is <em> really </em> not the time. “Can’t you just… ignore my summons?”</p><p> </p><p>“What part of “I’m bound to you until I have your soul” do you not understand?”</p><p> </p><p>The corners of Kyungsoo’s lips tighten at the demon's attitude. “And what part of “I don’t want to give you my soul” do <em> you </em> not understand?”</p><p> </p><p>“Look,” Chanyeol says with intense annoyance and irritation. “<em> I </em> am not the one who summoned a demon. You knew the consequences. You don’t have to give me your soul right now but you will have to eventually.” White, blue eyes stare intensely, effortlessly powerful and Kyungsoo resists the urge to look away. “Even when you die, your soul is <em> mine </em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s breath hitches. “So I’m fucked either way then.”</p><p> </p><p>And for the first time in their whole encounter, Chanyeol looks remorseful. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“Why did you summon me anyway?” Chanyeol asks after some time. Maybe the stuffy silence got to him.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo didn’t care for the silence, he’s still coming to terms with his new life arrangement. </p><p> </p><p>He’s going to Hell. </p><p> </p><p>Because– Because this is essentially what giving your soul to a demon is.</p><p> </p><p>Dying and then going to Hell. Spending eternity there. Suffering. </p><p> </p><p>But then again, Kyungsoo would have already been on his way there, if his mom’s personal religious beliefs are in fact, correct. </p><p> </p><p>And with that very minimal and very shitty comfort, Kyungsoo answers Chanyeol. </p><p> </p><p>“I got into an argument with my mom and I think I have to move out.” Kyungsoo internally cringes, that sentence made him sound petty, childish. Glancing at Chanyeol, he quickly adds, “She doesn’t support my sexuality and it’s getting toxic and I don't know.” Kyungsoo sighs, already exhausted from thinking about it. </p><p> </p><p>His mental and emotional health are basically a joke at this point. </p><p> </p><p>“So instead of talking it out with your friends, you decide to summon a demon,” Chanyeol raises an eyebrow, the one with the scar and Kyungsoo wonders if it hurts. Chanyeol’s scars, the ones on his face, the ones that add to his allure.  </p><p> </p><p>“Do they hurt?” Kyungsoo asks, purposefully ignoring Chanyeol’s question. “Your scars.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol’s hand goes up to his face, fingers brushing against them. Kyungsoo registers how big the demon's hands are, his long, thick fingers. </p><p> </p><p>“Do they bother you?” Chanyeol asks, an obvious edge to his voice that takes Kyungsoo by surprise. </p><p> </p><p>“No but it seems like they bother <em> you </em>,” Kyungsoo states, clear and unapologetic, mimicking Chanyeol’s tone that had been consistent throughout their entire conversation. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol clenches his jaw.</p><p> </p><p><em> Sore subject, </em> Kyungsoo thinks, a little smug. Delighted that he was able to find something that bothers the demon, an insecurity. </p><p> </p><p>It gives him a tiny sense of control, something to press on. He wants Chanyeol to feel as uncomfortable as Kyungsoo is feeling. </p><p> </p><p>Because just like talking about his scars made Chanyeol feel uneasy, talking about his friends, or lack thereof, makes Kyungsoo feel apprehensive.</p><p> </p><p>But Chanyeol is braver than Kyungsoo. </p><p> </p><p>“They do bother me a little,” Chanyeol says, fully embracing the uncomfortable air that he had whipped around the two of them. “But I don’t mind talking about them. You however, are <em> clearly </em> bothered about the subject of friendships.”</p><p> </p><p>“How do you <em> do </em>that?” Kyungsoo says, spiteful and amazed. This must be how stars feel, when the sun takes its place in the early morning sky, it’s light transforming the night sky.</p><p> </p><p>“I told you, it’s part of the job, being able to read someone’s emotions.” And then he changes the subject, quick, not <em> quite </em> painless. “So why does it bother you?”</p><p> </p><p>“Why do you care?” Kyungsoo says, voice sharp, working his jaw. </p><p> </p><p>“Because we’re going to spend a lifetime together so we might as well get to know each other.” </p><p> </p><p>And there’s something about the way that Chanyeol is calm about it that stirred something within Kyungsoo’s stomach. </p><p> </p><p>Fear. Unease. All of this felt so unnatural, like a piece of the sun falling into the sea. </p><p> </p><p>It was a little alarming how easily Chanyeol had accepted his fate but it’s not surprising. To him, it’s just a handful of years. </p><p> </p><p>“Tell me about your scars first.” The sharpness in Kyungsoo’s voice left, albeit reluctantly. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol does. </p><p> </p><p>And even though he does a very good job of showing how unbothered he is, it’s still an act on a stage, and the question is if Kyungsoo is the intended audience or if it’s Chanyeol himself. </p><p> </p><p>“I did something that I wasn’t supposed to do, back when I was first starting out,” Chanyeol says, voice low and smooth.</p><p> </p><p><em> Starting out? What does that mean? </em> Kyungsoo thinks. <em> When he was first created? Or was he a damned soul and then upgraded or something?  </em></p><p> </p><p>There were a lot of questions on Kyungsoo’s mind, on the tip of his tongue, ready to jump out but he held them back tightly. Chanyeol is right, they had a whole lifetime to get to know each other. </p><p> </p><p>The demon continues. “See, Inferno–”</p><p> </p><p>“You mean Hell?” Kyungsoo interrupted. </p><p> </p><p>“Yes though Lucifer hates the term ‘Hell’. Even though Inferno means Hell, but that’s beside the point,” Chanyeol rambles on.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo, upon hearing the name of the King of Hell, or <em> Inferno </em>, feels a little unsettled, once again reminded of the situation he was in. </p><p> </p><p>“As I was saying,” Chanyeol shifts his weight onto another foot and Kyungsoo makes a mental note to allow Chanyeol to step out of the pentagram. </p><p> </p><p>There was really no use in keeping him trapped there now. Kyungsoo also has the feeling that Chanyeol wouldn’t hurt him. </p><p> </p><p>But then again, Kyungsoo’s intuition has failed him before. Like when he summoned a demon for example.</p><p> </p><p>“–is a pretty nice place, it’s not stuffy like Heaven–”</p><p> </p><p><em> Heaven. </em> That word echoed in Kyungsooo’s head, promising to follow him forever. So his mom was right, he mused. Well it didn’t matter <em> now </em>.</p><p> </p><p>“–still have some rules that have to be followed.” Chanyeol’s features turn notably dark, thoughts frozen above him, hovering in dead space as a whirlwind of memories seemed to slice through his very being. </p><p> </p><p>The demon looks away.</p><p> </p><p> “Despite what most people think, not all children go into Heaven.” Chanyeol clenches his jaw into a tight line. “And I can get behind that because let’s face it, there are some children who are just <em> evil. </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo thinks about Aunt Seoyong’s kids. They’re brats, annoying little shits and rude. But Kyungsoo knows that’s not the kind of evil Chanyeol isreferring to.</p><p> </p><p>“But then there are some who haven’t done anything wrong.” Chanyeol continues and he faces Kyungsoo, turns his full body towards the college student and there’s this <em> look </em>on Chanyeol’s face. Kyungsoo can’t decipher it but it gives him a heavy, sinking feeling, a sense of imposing dread.  </p><p> </p><p>“They’ve done <em> nothing </em> wrong,” Chanyeol insists and Kyungsoo gets the feeling that the insistence isn’t for <em> him </em> but rather for those who reside in the clouds. “At least nothing that would condemn them to Inferno but they still sent her down there.” </p><p> </p><p>Blue, white eyes meet Kyungsoo’s. Deep and bitter. <em> Sad </em>. </p><p> </p><p>“I tried to help.” Chanyeol says, his voice catching on something. </p><p> </p><p>Then he scoffs, a dark sound.</p><p> </p><p>“It didn’t matter in the end.” Chanyeol adds flatly, “I was punished. And now I have the scars as a reminder, forever embedded onto me, no matter what form I take. I can hide them but they’ll never be gone.”</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Kyungsoo comes to a conclusion. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol isn’t as bad as he presents himself as. </p><p> </p><p>That doesn’t mean Kyungsoo is going to completely let down his guard, but Kyungsoo thinks he can find some sympathy for this man. Some <em> hope </em> for their future together. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“Sorry, was that too heavy?” Chanyeol asks, very obviously trying to play it off. He shouldn’t do that. His feelings are valid. </p><p> </p><p>“A little,” Kyungsoo replies, if only to indulge in Chanyeol’s tactic. “But thanks for sharing.”</p><p> </p><p>And then Kyungsoo tells Chanyeol about why he got defensive about the question. Kyungsoo talks about how he’s always been too shy and anxious to pursue friendships. He mentions Sehun and Jongdae, how they’re amazing and funny but Kyungsoo has never made the effort to spend time with them outside of class. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo talks about his horrible habit of keeping everyone away, never letting anyone get near him emotionally and how he’s scared to open up to anyone.</p><p> </p><p>“I guess it’s the daddy issues,” Kyungsoo says, with just the right amount of satire and sarcasm. His tone is an invitation for Chanyeol, that he can laugh, <em> please </em> laugh or else it’ll get awkward fast. “ <em> And </em> mommy issues.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol lets out a sound that could be described as a suppressed chuckle mixed with a huff. Kyungsoo relaxes his muscles, unaware that they were coiled tightly in the first place. </p><p> </p><p>So Chanyeol can appreciate some coping humor. Nice. </p><p> </p><p>“You do that a lot,” Chanyeol mentions, eyes careful as he watches Kyungsoo inch closer. “Throw out some half assed humor as a distraction, to diminish the importance of the fact that you struggle to open up to people.”</p><p> </p><p>“Yep.” Kyungsoo pops the ‘p’. </p><p> </p><p>Now that he’s processed everything, he finds it’s oddly comfortable speaking to Chanyeol about things like this. They just met but Kyungsoo doesn’t have the urge to impress Chanyeol or be careful with his words. </p><p> </p><p>They’re going to be together for a <em> long </em> time so what’s the point with putting on some theatre?  </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo stops in front of Chanyeol, the distance of the sun and the moon during an eclipse, his feet barely touching the pentagram. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s heart beats in his chest, ready to explode through his skin. He feels a little nervous but mostly, he’s eager to see what’s going to happen next.  </p><p> </p><p>And maybe his heart is also struggling to hold itself together over the fact that Chanyeol is <em> very </em> tall and broad and strong and handsome and hot and Kyungsoo feels as though his heart is about to shatter into hundreds, thousands, millions of pieces and cut up his soul. </p><p> </p><p>“You don’t want anyone to care about you.” Chanyeol states, looking down at Kyungsoo, his white and blue eyes swirling with sincerity, like a faded galaxy, keeping Kyungsoo in place by the gravity of it. “Why?”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s taken back by the question, by the unfamiliarity of it and it’s gentle concern. He breathes out, “I don’t know.” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol looks at Kyungsoo for a moment or two, the amount of time it takes for the stars to wake up.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol let’s it slide, and it is easier than what Kyungsoo had expected but then he remembers once again that they have a lifetime together. </p><p> </p><p>This question can be answered later. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“So what now?” The words tumble out of Kyungsoo’s lips. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pointedly looks down at his feet, at the red pentagram drawn on the floor.</p><p> </p><p>“Right,” Kyungsoo mutters and then he asks, “So do you think you can make sure the paint doesn’t stain the floor?”</p><p> </p><p>“Of course,” Chanyeol flashes him a quick grin, all boyish and promising, gold lit on fire   </p><p> </p><p><em> I’m fucked aren’t I? </em> Kyungsoo thinks. </p><p> </p><p>“Okay,” Kyungsoo breathes out, because his brain can’t offer up another word. And then he adds, “Thank you.” </p><p> </p><p>“You’re welcome.” Chanyeol replies, face still decorated with a crooked smile and <em> dimples. </em></p><p> </p><p>A brief moment of silence.</p><p> </p><p>Then, “Can you break the protective barrier?”</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t know how.”  Kyungsoo’s lips tilt downward slightly. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol glances at Kyungsoo’s mouth. Kyungsoo ignores it. It’s nothing. </p><p> </p><p>“Say, ‘I allow Chanyeøl to break the barrier.’”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo pouts a little. “But I can’t pronounce your name properly. What if it doesn’t work?”</p><p> </p><p>“Try,” Chanyeol coaxes, voice deep.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo swallows, internally cringes when he stumbles over the demon's true name.</p><p> </p><p>And Chanyeol steps forward.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“WHAT THE <em> FUCK </em> IS THIS?” Kyungsoo shouts, standing up from his desk, his phone slightly shaking in his hand. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo runs his free hand through his hair, making it stick up and his heart starts pounding, out of fear and surprise. Worry. </p><p> </p><p>And Kyungsoo knows he’s blind but he’s <em> not </em> blind enough to mistake twenty-four dollars and fourteen cents for <em> thirty-three thousand dollars </em>. </p><p> </p><p>Because last time he checked, that amount of money was <em> not </em> there. And that was pretty recent, <em> last night </em> recent, when he had been hungry and the dining hall was closed and he wondered if using UberEats was <em> really </em> the best decision for his wallet.</p><p> </p><p>“Holy fucking shit, who did I<em> rob </em>?” Kyungsoo mutters, refreshing the balance statement page. </p><p> </p><p><em> This has to be a mistake, </em> Kyungsoo thinks. It isn’t, his shitty eyes are showing him the truth: he has thirty-three thousand dollars in his account. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m going to fucking jail.” Kyungsoo mutters.</p><p> </p><p>And not in a funny way, like those comments of “JAILLLLLLL” under a funny Twitter post. No, Kyungsoo means an <em> actual </em> federal prison.  </p><p> </p><p>Because he’s almost one-hundred percent sure that <em> L &amp; C Inc. </em> is a shell company and they somehow transferred money to Kyungsoo’s bank account and made him an accomplice to money laundering.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh, you got the money.” A deep voice says over Kyungsoo’s shoulder. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo gasps out loud as he jumps, feeling as though his heart is being jerked out of his chest. He’s about to look over his shoulder but then realizes how <em> close </em> Chanyeol was. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo can <em> feel </em> Chanyeol’s chest, not quite <em> touching </em> Kyungsoo’s back but close enough for him to feel the ghost touch of it. The whisper of it’s warmth and strength. </p><p> </p><p>The words, <em> Can you back off? </em> dies on Kyungsoo’s lips, wilts away because Kyungsoo doesn’t mind this proximity at all, doesn’t mind the clear yet subtle display of strength. </p><p> </p><p>So Kyungsoo, struggling to keep rose petals off his cheeks, looks straight ahead as he asks, “What are you talking about?”</p><p> </p><p>“The thirty-three thousand in your bank account.” Chanyeol responds, with a confused tilt to his voice. “Sorry it took so long, Junmyeon was the one who took my request and he <em> actually </em> follows the procedures, which is so annoying because no one else does–”</p><p> </p><p>“Wait <em> what </em> ?” Kyungsoo turns around, causing Chanyeol to take a step back and finally let him <em> breathe </em> . It’s hard to think when all that’s running through Kyungsoo’s head is <em> please touch me.  </em></p><p> </p><p>“You’re responsible for this?” Kyungsoo raises his phone, showing Chanyeol his bank statement.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah.” Chanyeol looks at Kyungsoo’s phone then back at Kyungsoo. “Is that not enough?”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Huh? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“Chanyeol, please explain to me more clearly,” Kyungsoo says, starting to feel exasperated. “Because right now, I’m scared the fucking Feds and the IRS are gonna start knocking at my door.”</p><p> </p><p>“When you summoned me,” Chanyeol says, slowly, “You mentioned that you had college debts right? So I requested the money to be transferred to your bank.”</p><p> </p><p>“How did you get my information?” Kyungsoo asks, voice a little tense.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m the spawn of Satan, it’s not hard finding out some personal info.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo decides not to address the snideness. “Who’s L &amp; C Incorporated?” </p><p> </p><p>“It’s where Lucifer keeps Inferno’s holdings. The C stands for Chanyeøl, since I’m the one requesting the money.” Chanyeol informs, patiently, his curly pink hair falling onto his forehead. It looks really soft.</p><p> </p><p>“Is it legit? It’s not <em> fake </em> right? Or stolen.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol scoffs a little, harmless. “C’mon Soo, give us <em> some </em> benefit of the doubt, the cash is real, I swear.”</p><p> </p><p>“<em> Soo </em>?” Kyungsoo refuses to acknowledge the delightful feeling of butterflies fluttering in his stomach.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol grins, flashing his dimples. <em> Oh god. </em> “It’s cute.”</p><p> </p><p>“You were saying?” Kyungsoo says, not really having the emotional capacity to dissect that. The more he dwells on it, the worse this light feeling within him becomes.</p><p> </p><p>“The money is all yours.” Chanyeol says, seemingly passing up the chance to tease Kyungsoo. “You can do whatever you want with it and there's more but I thought you’d like to take care of your tuition and housing first.”</p><p> </p><p>“What do you mean there’s <em> more </em>?” Kyungsoo narrows his eyes, weary. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol tilts his head. “There’s <em> more </em>. An unlimited amount, ready for you. All you have to do is tell me and you’ll have the money in an hour. Well, unless Junmyeon is the one taking requests, then it’ll probably take a day or two.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungoo’s heart twists. His soul in exchange for comfort. For never worrying about anything ever again.</p><p> </p><p>He doesn’t want to think about it. Just because he’s come to terms with it doesn’t mean he’s <em> okay </em> with it. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo also isn’t the type of person to bite the hand that feeds him, even though it could be argued that he’s feeding himself. </p><p> </p><p>“I’ll go make a deposit at the housing office then.” Kyungsoo informs Chanyeol, voice soft, still wrapping his head around everything.</p><p> </p><p>And then Kyungsoo thinks for a bit. Thinks about his mom, about his new life situation.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey Chanyeol?” He asks.</p><p> </p><p>“What is it?” </p><p> </p><p>“Do you think you can look into some apartments near here? I think I’m going to stay here for summer break.”</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Kyungsoo bites the inside of his check, mildly annoyed. </p><p> </p><p>He’s been waiting in this line for what feels like forever and when he had first entered the housing office, he was relieved to see there was only one other person in line for the payment window. </p><p> </p><p>But Kyungsoo’s pretty sure it’s been a good twenty minutes. </p><p> </p><p>He suppresses a sigh when he heard the college student ask, “Are you sure? Like, positive? Because I was told differently. Is the head of the finance office here?”</p><p> </p><p><em> Karen </em>, Kyungsoo thinks, shifting his weight from one foot to another, wondering if he should just come back another time.</p><p> </p><p>He decides to stay, he <em> hates </em> dragging things out, it only makes everything worse, fills him up with an ocean of anxiety. Paying housing doesn’t usually cause Kyungsoo to feel worried and apprehensive, usually it’s relief of paying off his charge, <em> anger </em> at having to pay so fucking <em> much. </em> But at least he never had to worry if his money would be declared counterfeit.  </p><p> </p><p>Fuck, he’s <em> so </em> screwed if the money turns out fake. </p><p> </p><p>“You know what? I’ll just come back later.” </p><p> </p><p><em> Finally, </em> Kyungsoo thinks, walking up to the window. </p><p> </p><p>The university employee exhales heavily, clearly annoyed. </p><p> </p><p>Tentatively, Kyungsoo says, “I would like to make a housing payment please.”</p><p> </p><p>They school their facial expression to resemble something more positive, fake, but Kyungsoo appreciates the effort. Customer service is hard.</p><p> </p><p>“Sure. Can I see your student ID please?”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo hands them his ID, internally cringing at his picture. It was taken freshman year, back when he didn’t have all this shit to worry about. </p><p> </p><p>The sound of typing fills in the silence. So does the beating of Kyungsoo’s anxious heart. </p><p> </p><p>“Okay, would you like to pay for this month or for the whole semester?”</p><p> </p><p>“The semester, please.”</p><p> </p><p>More typing and clicking.</p><p> </p><p>“Okay that will be fifteen thousand, four hundred and fifty two dollars. Would you be paying with cash, card or check?”</p><p> </p><p>“Card.” Even though he has enough to cover the amount, Kyungsoo is very reluctant to pay it. Partly because it’s a lot of money but also because he didn’t know if the money Chanyeol gave him will go through.</p><p> </p><p>The employee swipes Kyungsoo’s card and Kyungsoo watches, overstrung, worried. If his card get’s decline, he’ll die of embarrassment, he’ll transfer out, he’ll fucking do it but before he does that he’ll kick Chanyeol’s non-existant ass.</p><p> </p><p>There’s a beep.</p><p> </p><p>“Will that be all for today?” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo exhales all of his worries and inhales a breath of relief and gratefulness. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Kyungsoo walks into his room and he stops, staring. </p><p> </p><p>“How did it go?”</p><p> </p><p><em> Thump, thump </em> . “I thought you left,” Kyungsoo says, struggling to breathe, to keep his voice steady and his eyes from wondering, from taking all of those <em> muscles. </em>“I thought you went back to Hell.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol breathes in and his chest rises like the sun does every morning. Kyungsoo’s heart trembles. </p><p> </p><p>“I did but then I sensed you were coming back so I manifested.” </p><p> </p><p>“Did your shirt get lost on the way here?” Kyungsoo is so proud of himself for keeping a cool exterior. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol laughs a little, a chuckle, deep and steady and his abdominal muscles flex and his collar bones catch the light in a manner that one only sees in paintings. A heavy drop of <em> want </em> falls on Kyungsoo’s tongue, the taste slowly consuming him.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s hot in here,” Chanyeol replies with a slight tilt to his voice and lips.</p><p> </p><p>The excuse is <em> slightly </em> plausible. The A/C isn’t on and the weather is edging on the hotter side but <em> still </em>. </p><p> </p><p>And it’s not that Kyungsoo doesn’t appreciate the sight of a shirtless man on his bed, he does, <em> a lot </em> but he’s hesitant. If they decide to go that route and it doesn’t work out or once the desire is sated, it’s not like Kyungsoo can ghost Chanyeol. He’s stuck with this man for the rest of his life.</p><p> </p><p>What if Chanyeol falls in love with him? It’s a stretch but still a possibility. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo is too careful to fall in love. </p><p> </p><p>Too weary of the word. He isn’t fond of opening up to someone and being vulnerable like that. He’s too insecure, too closed off, unwilling to trust someone in that manner.</p><p> </p><p>He’s seen what love does to someone, how much it can <em> hurt </em>. His mom loved his dad but look at all the many times she was cheated on or verbally berated. Kyungsoo loves his mom but how many times did she bring him down, made him feel insecure and unwanted?</p><p> </p><p>Sex is fine. Easy. </p><p> </p><p>But the moment it becomes something more, Kyungsoo knows he’ll be too much of a coward to stay.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo forces himself to roll his eyes. “Just put on a shirt.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pouts. “Fine.” </p><p> </p><p>He reaches next to him, arm’s flexing, holding so much power. Chanyeol effortlessly slips on a t-shirt. Covering up the valleys and grooves of golden skin. “Happy?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo tries to swallow back the echoes of his heart ringing in his throat. All of this already feels like too much.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“You’re so ungrateful you know that? So fucking selfish, you never stop to think about how your actions affect me. What about <em> my </em> mental health huh? What about what <em> I </em> feel comfortable with?”</p><p> </p><p>“This isn’t about <em> you </em> , mom!” <em> Breathe </em> . <em> It’s okay, just take a deep breath </em>.</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t yell at me!”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not–!” Kyungsoo takes in a tight breath, his body tense, his throat clenching and his eyes were starting to water. He hates crying. “I just want you to hear me out, can you just do that <em> please </em>?”</p><p> </p><p>“I always listen to you Kyungsoo! How about you listen to <em> me </em> for once? How do you think I feel having a gay son?”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not gay, I’m <em> bi </em> . And you’re really– you’re really <em> hurting me right now. </em>” Kyungsoo is struggling to keep his voice steady, to keep the anger and hurt from exploding through his skin and there’s an urge to cry and scream. </p><p> </p><p>“You hurt <em> me </em> ! How the hell are you going to call me up, say you’re moving out and <em> accuse </em> me of being homophoic–”</p><p> </p><p>“THAT’S BECAUSE YOU ARE!” Kyungsoo shouts, voice shaking and twisting and he’s desperate to make her understand, to feel loved again, to be accepted. To finally be able to exhale for the first time in his life. “If you weren’t homophic then we wouldn’t be having this conversation, I wouldn’t be moving out, you would still love me and treat me the same as before, like a fucking human being! Instead you’re making me feel like shit right now and I can’t be around you anymore!”</p><p> </p><p>“It doesn’t have to be this way, just come back home–!”</p><p> </p><p>“You know what?” Kyungsoo interrupts, an acid taste in his mouth. “I’m done. I don’t know what else I can <em> do </em> or say–” <em> Don’t cry, don’t cry. </em> He takes a breath and it tastes bitter.“I just wanted you to <em> look </em> at me.”</p><p> </p><p>“<em> What are you even talking about– </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m going to get all of my stuff. Soon. I’ll leave the keys on the table.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo hangs up. Drops his phone on his bed.</p><p> </p><p>His heart falls apart.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>The next morning, he is met with the sight of Chanyeol in his kitchen, cooking breakfast, hair soft and curly. Disgustingly cute and domestic.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo becomes aware of how swollen his eyes feel. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol gives him a smile but it doesn’t feel <em> right </em>. It looks worried.</p><p> </p><p>He places a plate full of scrambled eggs and bacon on the small table. Kyungsoo sits down, thinks of something to say but he finds his tongue feels heavy, still consumed from last night, from the words that had wounded him deeply. </p><p> </p><p>Then Chanyeol says, “I went to your mom’s house earlier today and packed up your things. They’re in a storage unit not far from here.”</p><p> </p><p>Questions run through Kyungsoo’s mind, his fingers tremble a little, the air in his lungs isn’t enough suddenly. <em> Why? </em> tumble out of his mouth, the letters splattering onto his eggs. </p><p> </p><p>He’s not angry. </p><p> </p><p>He’s stunned. </p><p> </p><p>Unexpectedly touched by Chanyeol’s actions and Kyungsoo has the urge to wash his soul in Chanyeol’s kindness and cry out the ocean lodged in his throat. </p><p> </p><p>“Because I don’t want you to hurt anymore.” Chanyeol says, gentle and achingly soft and deeply warm.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo breathes out, shaky and the tears lodged in his throat <em> pulsate. </em></p><p> </p><p>“<em> Thank you </em>.” Kyungsoo says as he strings his heart back together.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“Do you like it?” Chanyeol asks, a week later, from the living room, sitting on the couch he just manifested into the apartment. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo is currently in the kitchen, carefully placing his cacti onto the window sill just above the sink. They’re his babies and Kyungsoo wants them to be settled in, to give everything more finality. </p><p> </p><p>“The living room isn’t very spacious,” Chanyeol continues, sounding closer.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s okay!” Kyungsoo raises his voice a little, struggling to tilt Alien so the sun can hit her <em> just right </em>. Frustrated, Kyungsoo stands on his tip-toes, leaning against the sink. “Everything’s perfect!”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo didn’t require much space and the living room seemed spacious enough. It’s not like he was going to invite anyone over.  Everyone is supposed to be in quarantine after all. </p><p> </p><p>It wasn’t mandatory by the state but Kyungsoo knows it’s only a matter of time so he ended his housing contract with his university and signed the year long deed to this apartment right away. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo lets out a breath and it spreads throughout his outstretched arm, strained, tight and frustrated.</p><p> </p><p>And then a deep, “<em> Let me help </em>,” falls from above, warm rolling thunder, causing Kyungsoo’s heart to spin devastatingly into a supernova.</p><p> </p><p>A large hand on his hips. Warm, grounding.</p><p> </p><p>A firm, strong chest pressing against Kyungsoo’s back,</p><p> </p><p>and Chanyeol reaches over, enveloping his body around Kyungsoo even more, warmth seeping in, slowly, like sunlight onto the dark canvas of the night sky and there’s a strangled tension around them, filling in all the spaces.</p><p> </p><p>It was brief, it should have been<em> insignificant </em>but it left Kyungsoo with the suffocating urge to press his lips onto every part of Chanyeol.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pulls away, leaving a breath and a planet in between them. </p><p> </p><p>“There.” He says, with a soft, crooked smile. As if he can’t feel how <em> tangible </em> the air was.</p><p> </p><p>Maybe it was just Kyungsoo who feels it but he’ll make Chanyeol feel it too.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Chanyeol had kissed Kyungsoo hungrily. Desperately.</p><p> </p><p>Had been eager to break Kyungsoo open and <em> taste </em> him and he had been so <em> close </em> and Kyungsoo had found himself gasping, breathing Chanyeol in, taking in the feeling of hands roaming his bare skin, pressing down gently but with so much power that it threatened to crack Kyungsoo open.</p><p> </p><p>And Kyungsoo touched Chanyeol as well, touched his chest and his shoulders and pressed red crescent moons onto his back when he was being worked open, with fingers and then with a cock, stretched and filled. </p><p> </p><p>“<em> Chanyeol </em>,” Kyungsoo had breathed out, pressed into the curve of Chanyeol’s hard muscles, his body, his warmth and his sweet words. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol had whispered nice things into Kyungsoo’s ears,<em> you feel so good, so so pretty, I can’t believe I’m the first one, fuck do that again please </em></p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo had been shocked by Chanyeol’s gentle hands, his soft kisses and earnest eyes. </p><p> </p><p>Later, when he placed his hands on Chanyeol’s hips and slid his cock past Chanyeol’s tight rim, Kyungsoo pulled him closer, swallowed all of the pretty sounds, all of the <em> yes right there, harder, faster, don’t tease me Soo, it’s not fair </em></p><p> </p><p>There had been an electric charge between them that Kyungsoo hadn’t anticipated, it made his head spin, and a burst of heat clawed within him.</p><p> </p><p>After, as he watched Chanyeol sleeping beside him, the gentle sunlight framing his face along with strands of pink hair, Kyungsoo's heart stuttered and it was startling.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Kyungsoo thought this was like all the other times, he <em> hoped </em> it would be like all of his past relationships. </p><p> </p><p>That once the novelty of sleeping together wore off so would the attraction, so would this feeling he got whenever Chanyeol was around, like he’s dying to breathe, dying to taste Chanyeol and feel the warmth from underneath the pads of his fingers.</p><p> </p><p>But it seems to get worse with every second that passed, with every crooked smile and every flash of dimples.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo gets pretty good at ignoring this feeling. </p><p> </p><p>It's hard though, when Chanyeol says things that leave his heart sighing and Kyungsoo tells himself that only a fool would fall in love with pretty words. </p><p> </p><p>But it’s not just <em> pretty </em> words, it’s all those <em> actions </em> , all the small things Chanyeol does. Things that trick Kyungsoo’s mind into thinking that Chanyeol <em> cares </em> for him. </p><p> </p><p>That it’s okay if Kyungsoo starts to care too. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> This is ridiculous. </em>
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</p><p>“What do you want from me?” Kyungsoo says tiredly into the phone molded against his cheek. He shouldn’t have answered the phone but he was still holding on to the ridiculous hope that his mother would change her mind. </p><p> </p><p>“I want you to come to your senses, <em> please </em>. How could you just leave?”</p><p> </p><p>“I said I was, didn't I?”</p><p> </p><p>“You’re being overdramatic! And where are you even getting all of this money from??”</p><p> </p><p>“I saved up.” Kyungsoo replies, vaguely, tired of all of this. </p><p> </p><p>He doesn’t want to talk anymore, he doesn’t want to <em> deal </em>with this anymore. He just wants to call Chanyeol, wrap himself in strong arms, press his nose to his collar bones, breathe in Chanyeol’s strength, warmth, and reassurance. He’s the only thing keeping Kyungsoo from believing the world is truly a bleak place. </p><p> </p><p>Maybe it’s not right, becoming dependent on someone, especially if it’s not supposed to be more than causal. And Kyungsoo actively resists the pull but it’s impossible to defeat gravity when Chanyeol does nothing but <em> encourage </em>Kyungsoo’s fall.</p><p> </p><p>One problem at a time. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo registers that his mom had gone off on a tangent, rambling on about some bullshit. Kyungsoo has had enough.</p><p> </p><p>“Have you ever considered,” Kyungsoo tells her, calmly, numb, “that it’s <em> you </em>? That you’re the problem in this entire situation?”</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t talk back to me like that.” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo tilts his head back, a heavy sigh falling from his lips and splashing onto his shoes. It isn’t worth his time, <em> this </em> isn’t worth anything. He needs to move on, needs to stop fucking dwelling on this. </p><p> </p><p>“Bye, mom.” </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“I’m sorry.” Chanyeol murmurs, chin pressing against the top of Kyungsoo’s head.</p><p> </p><p>The words <em> don’t be </em> fall from Kyungsoo’s lips automatically. Regret molds around those words, maybe he shouldn’t have called Chanyeol, shouldn’t have allowed himself to be placed in between a firm chest and arms emitting strength and understanding. </p><p> </p><p>He’s expected to talk about his feelings now and just the thought of that causes the feeling of discomfort to make its way to the forefront of his consciousness. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo forgets that Chanyeol can sense emotional shifts.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m still sorry.” Chanyeol says, voice deep, melting onto Kyungsoo’s heart. “It’s not easy letting go of someone so important to you and I know you don’t wanna talk about it so I’ll drop it.” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo fills his lungs with air while simultaneously feeling as though his throat is tightening. </p><p> </p><p>“Do you realize,” he says quietly to Chanyeol, “that you’re the only one I have right now?” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol breathes in and Kyungsoo’s cheek rises and falls with Chanyeol’s chest, the same motion the sun has been doing for eons. </p><p> </p><p>“I really hope you don’t feel that way.”</p><p> </p><p>“Why?” Kyungsoo asks, insecure, embarrassed for putting himself out into the open like that. He’s ready to remove himself from this warmth that has once again managed to interfere with his reasoning. How can he just <em> say </em> something like that?</p><p> </p><p>“Because I don’t want you to feel alone, or like you only have me to turn to, you know? I just—” Chanyeol lets out a sigh and it fills Kyungsoo with anticipation. “I just want you to be happy, on your own, without having to depend on someone— am I making any sense?” </p><p> </p><p>The lack of confidence is odd but the faint implication that Chanyeol might be flustered, showing a rare side of himself, left Kyungsoo feeling the blooming of roses on his cheeks.</p><p> </p><p>And with the strength of Chanyeol’s silhouette pressing against him, Kyungsoo thinks about saying all the feelings that have come to compromise his being, stringing his limbs together, keeping him from becoming a whisper of what he once was. </p><p> </p><p>But Kyungsoo’s scared. Terrified.</p><p> </p><p>So he simply says, “<em> Okay </em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol presses Kyungsoo tighter against his body, against his arms. Later, with Chanyeol’s fingers dancing on bare skin and his lips pressing scorching flower petals everywhere, Kyungsoo receives the impression that Chanyeol knows about his feelings. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>When Kyungsoo was told the whole country was going into quarantine, and school was closing down, he redownloaded TikTok. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo knew he would have a lot of time on his hands because come on,<em> online school </em>? Who the fuck is going to wake up for that? Definitely not him.</p><p> </p><p>It was exactly what he had expected: fifteen year olds who tried to look mature were posting videos of them dancing to the <em> same </em> dance, the <em> same </em> moves over and over. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo hasn’t had time to fix his algorithm to show the videos he enjoyed the most. Cooking and sarcastic Gen Z humor.</p><p> </p><p>Granted, there were a few puppy videos but Kyungsoo couldn’t survive off of pups and a sixteen year old boy doing POVs dramatically, with no reason except to promote his body and jawline.</p><p> </p><p>Like right now, Kyungsoo was laying on the couch, open laptop on his lap, an empty google doc titled <em> Philosophy Thesis </em>glaring at him. It was due in five hours but Kyungsoo could care less, devoting all of his attention to a TikTok hashtag that he didn’t really know how to feel about. </p><p> </p><p>#sonofsatan</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo had watched in confusion when a video on his feed showed a boy who couldn’t be older than seventeen, wearing a black beanie, a chain and those neon lights around the room that everyone seems to have nowadays. The boy was <em> alright </em> in terms of looks but Kyungsoo didn’t want to think too much about this person's looks because well, he’s twenty and he could go to jail.</p><p> </p><p>Anyway, it was really just a video of the boy mouthing lyrics to a song and flashing his jawline. Kyungsoo didn’t really understand what was happening.</p><p> </p><p>And then he saw the caption.</p><p> </p><p>pov: you wished for a boyfriend but when your wish comes true, you find out that he is the son of satan. </p><p> </p><p>The son of <em> who? </em></p><p> </p><p>Partly intrigued, partly cringing, Kyungsoo clicks on the hashtag and is brought to a lot of videos with basically the same context. He watched them, cringing, the whole time, thinking about how <em> unrealistic </em> this is. </p><p> </p><p>“You find out your boyfriend is the son of satan?” A deep voice says over Kyungsoo’s shoulder.</p><p> </p><p>The college student jumps up, his heart jerking in his chest from fear. Kyungsoo looks behind him, his plush lips already formed into a frown. </p><p> </p><p>“How many times do I have to tell you not to do that?” Kyungsoo yells, locking his phone screen as discreetly as he could, embarrassed that he got caught. </p><p> </p><p>As always, Chanyeol ignores Kyungsoo’s plea to stop appearing randomly. “What were you watching? Let me see.”</p><p> </p><p>“No.” Kyungsoo says, face growing warm. </p><p> </p><p>“Please Soo?” Chanyeol tries, pouting, putting up his cute act. </p><p> </p><p>“That’s not gonna work,” Kyungsoo states, thinking of something to distract his boyfriend. </p><p> </p><p>Wait. </p><p> </p><p>Is it right to call Chanyeol his boyfriend? </p><p> </p><p>The word didn’t sit well with Kyungsoo, it felt like too much but writing off his relationship with the demon as friends with benefits felt wrong.</p><p> </p><p>Not because they weren't friends but because it felt dismissive to refer to their relationship as just a <em> fling </em> when it feels more than that. </p><p> </p><p><em> Oh fuck, </em> Kyungsoo thinks. <em> I can’t think like that.  </em></p><p> </p><p>“Fine,” Chanyeol’s pout disappears, his whole demeanor suddenly changes, becoming dark, more <em> devilish </em>. </p><p> </p><p>“I’ll force you,” Chanyeol says, in a voice that was deeper and harsher than his regular one, sending shivers down Kyungsoo’s spine, breaking it apart. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s not going to lie, it‘s kinda hot. </p><p> </p><p>He swallows, resisting the urge to rub his thighs together. “How am I supposed to be intimidated when you look like <em> that </em>?” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol frowns. “I thought I looked good.”</p><p> </p><p>“You do, Yeol.” Kyungsoo says effortlessly. “You look <em> cute </em>. Demons aren’t supposed to be cute.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol has his pink hair down, looking fluffy and covering the majority of his forehead. From what Kyungsoo can see without breaking his neck, Chanyeol wore an oversized sweater, pale blue.</p><p> </p><p>He looked good enough to eat, in Kyungsoo’s opinion. </p><p> </p><p>“That’s stereotyping,” Chanyeol points out, chin still placed on the head rest of the couch.</p><p> </p><p>“Just take the compliment,” Kyungsoo returns, thinking that Chanyeol forgot his original question.</p><p> </p><p>The demon grins, lips quirking up in a soft and tender way that made butterflies migrate to Kyungsoo’s stomach and touch the moon itself.</p><p> </p><p>It made Kyungsoo want to kiss Chanyeol.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol beats him to it. </p><p> </p><p>The demon kisses in a slow and careful manner, lips working against Kyungsoo’s plump, eager ones. It’s a leisure pace, like Chanyeol didn’t have anything else to do other than to kiss and take. His lips take Kyungsoo’s bottom lip in between his own, and soon Kyungsoo found himself being worked open, tongues caressing each other.</p><p> </p><p>His heart too is at the mercy of Chanyeol, aching at the emotions being drawn out of him, coaxed out with every press of Chanyeol’s lips. </p><p> </p><p>Kissing Chanyeol always involves feelings, it makes Kyungsoo feel warm and it isn’t just lust and desire. It’s something more… tangible and special like star light or a pretty sigh from a cherry blossom in the middle of spring. </p><p> </p><p>It’s scary. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo feels his neck grow sore from straining it and so he breaks off the kiss, adjusting quickly on the couch before reaching forward and grabbing Chanyeol’s collar, lips touching lips again.</p><p> </p><p>The demon lifts himself up from his previous position, making it so he was hovering over Kyungsoo, easily taking control and Kyungsoo liked it, liked being the one to <em> take </em> it.</p><p> </p><p> It’s been a while since he was the one being kissed and not the one kissing.  </p><p> </p><p>And then Kyungsoo feels Chanyeol’s hand travel downward, big and warm, down the slight curve of Kyungoo’s back, and he thinks this was the perfect time to have sex, his paper could wait.</p><p> </p><p> Kyungsoo wonders if he should let Chanyeol top this time. </p><p> </p><p>It’s been a couple of months and with Chanyeol’s hands on him and Kyungsoo is suddenly desperate to feel those hands on his skin, inside of him, fingers stretching his walls, thick and long, much longer than Kyungsoo’s, <em> fuck </em> it’s been such a long time since he’s been stretched wonderfully–</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s eyes open quickly, pushing Chanyeol away but it was too late.</p><p> </p><p>His phone, that had been pressed against his back, was now in the demon’s possession. </p><p> </p><p>“Chanyeol–!” Kyungsoo gasps, trying to catch his breath, his lips feeling warm and tingly. “No, stop!”  </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol smirks, jumping up from his position and Kyungsoo gets up from the couch as well, springing up, alarmed when he realizes Chanyeol knew the password, Zuko’s fucking birthday. </p><p> </p><p>“<em> Chanyeol! </em>” Kyungsoo screeches, jumping forward, arms stretching. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol raises his arm over his head, clearly using his height to his advantage and it irkes Kyungsoo even more, working his jaw, furrowing his eyebrows. </p><p> </p><p>“You’re being an ass right now!” Kyungsoo says, his voice low and sharp. Embarrassment and  anxious awareness of how silly he is actually being easily gave away to anger.</p><p> </p><p>False anger if Kyungsoo is being honest. </p><p> </p><p>“Why kiss me and distract me when you could’ve used your demon powers.” Kyungsoo grits out, desperate to take control of the conversation and sway it in a different direction. </p><p> </p><p> Chanyeol pouts. <em> Pouts </em>. The audacity. </p><p> </p><p>“That’s not <em> fun </em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo scoffs. “So making me angry is fun?”</p><p> </p><p>“Of course,” Chanyeol smiles in an irritatingly smug way. “But I sense something else. Embarrassed you were caught?” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo bit the inside of his cheek, god he <em> hates </em> that Chanyeol can sense emotions so easily. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol had said he needs to sense what everyone is feeling in order to have a better control over them. Kyungsoo gets it but that doesn't mean <em> he </em> wants to be controlled and easily read as well. </p><p> </p><p>“What are you hiding Soo?” Chanyeol teases, slightly off for some reason. “Got someone on the side?” A flicker of something flashing through Chanyeol’s fake brown eyes. </p><p> </p><p>“They’re conspicuous, don’t you think? My eyes.” Chanyeol had asked once.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo had shrugged. “I don’t know, I kinda like them.”</p><p> </p><p>Ever since then, Chanyeol seems to have made an effort in showing his natural eye color but he’ll change it to brown when the demon believes it necessary for his outfit. </p><p> </p><p>Like today apparently.  </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol looks cute. He looks <em> normal. </em></p><p> </p><p>However, the hurt Chanyeol’s eyes isn’t so Kyungsoo tries to joke around, not one for direct emotional confrontation.</p><p> </p><p>“Jealous?” Kyungsoo teases, falling a tiny bit flat. Just a little.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol, to Kyungsoo’s immediate relief, took the bait. </p><p> </p><p>The demon tilts his head to the side, chuckling in a way that is supposed to be off putting but Kyungsoo thought it’s cute. Hot. </p><p> </p><p>“Not one bit.” Chanyeol met Kyungsoo’s eyes. “Who's to say I don’t have someone too?”</p><p> </p><p>Wow.</p><p> </p><p>Okay, it’s going to be like <em> that. </em> </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo tries not to bite back, tries to make his words sound indifferent, nonchalant but he wants to hurt Chanyeol too.</p><p> </p><p>“Well, we aren’t exclusive so you can do whatever you want.” Kyungsoo bites the inside of his cheek. His words sounded bitter and he was acting stupid and childish.  </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol must have heard it too because his eyebrows quirk up, a small preview of relentless teasing and provocation by words. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo hates being under scrutiny, it makes him feel uncomfortable.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo tries to steal his phone away, swiping his hand upwards, stretching but Chanyeol is quicker than the human, moving to the side in a fast and agile way that was clearly supernatural.</p><p> </p><p>“What are you hiding?” Chanyeol asks again, this time his tone more serious, his demeanor more grave. Kyungsoo doesn’t like that look, doesn't like the sudden turn in the air around them.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo sighs. “It’s really <em> nothing </em>.”</p><p> </p><p>“Then why are you acting like it’s <em> something.” </em></p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol’s right. Why <em> is </em> Kyungsoo making a big deal out of it? </p><p> </p><p>“It’s embarrassing.” Kyungsoo reluctantly says.</p><p> </p><p>He thinks for a bit. </p><p> </p><p>“Why didn’t you just force me to show you?” Kyungsoo asks. “You know, do that thing where you look into my eyes.”</p><p> </p><p>“Compel you?” Chanyeol shakes his head, bringing his arm down to his side. “I will never force you to do anything, Soo.” He meets Kyungsoo’s eyes, sincere and heavy with the meaning of that word. “I want you to trust me.”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh,” Kyungsoo replies, quiet, not really knowing what else to say. </p><p> </p><p>His heart, it seems, has a lot to say, has a lot of soft, warm feelings just begging to be let out, to drip over his aching soul.</p><p> </p><p>And then Chanyeol smiles, boyish and gentle, touching Kyungsoo unexpectedly. </p><p> </p><p>A jolt of sunshine rushes through Kyungsoo, his heart shatters into thousands of pieces and his eyes capture a million snapshots, All those little moments in time filled with the image of that boyish smile, of this man in front of him. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo has seen this smile before but there was something different this time, something about the way Chanyeol seems to be smiling with more than just those 10 muscles and it manages to crack open Kyungsoo’s heart even more as it convulses, dancing to it’s own destruction. </p><p> </p><p>And then Kyungsoo realizes that he’s in love.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>“If you don’t want to show me it’s fine,” Chanyeol says, handing Kyungsoo his phone.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo fumbles internally, his hand feeling like dead weight as he grabs his phone.</p><p> </p><p>“Um,” Kyungsoo spills out, thoughts completely reeling, jumping around and not forming a coherent sentence.</p><p> </p><p>“What?” Chanyeol asks, then taking on a more amused expression, he says, “Did my handsome face stun you? I have a pretty spectacular face, it’s okay if it’s too much–”</p><p> </p><p>“Shut up,” Kyungsoo says, pulled back into orbit by Chanyeol’s slight cringe humor. “And I was just watching some TikToks, and I saw a povs one, about having the son of satan as a boyfriend.”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh so you want to date the son of satan then? My demon ass is not evil enough?” Judging from Chanyeol’s voice, he isn’t bothered just as Kyungsoo had expected. </p><p> </p><p>The relentless teasing, however, <em> is </em> expected and that’s why Kyungsoo didn’t want Chanyeol to know. </p><p> </p><p>“<em> Does </em> Satan have sons?” Kyungsoo shoots back.</p><p> </p><p>“Of course,” Chanyeol shrugs. “If you’ve been alive for eons, you wouldn’t exactly be a virgin.”</p><p> </p><p>“You’ve been alive for a while.” Kyungsoo points out. “Do you have kids?”</p><p> </p><p>“I’ve had lovers but never kids, thank <em> God. </em>” </p><p> </p><p>A demon thanking God. How ironic.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo supposes it wouldn’t hurt to thank God as well. </p><p> </p><p>It’s relieving knowing Chanyeol didn’t have grandkids to spare. Learning that the demon had past lovers wasn’t surprising but it didn’t mean Kyungsoo wants to <em> keep </em> hearing. </p><p> </p><p>“Well you don’t have to worry about that with me, obviously.” Kyungsoo replies, thoughts fluttering around, wondering if there was even a future in this relationship. </p><p> </p><p>And Kyungsoo might be in love but that doesn’t mean he wants the chance of growing old and wrinkly with young and immortal Chanyeol by his side. </p><p> </p><p>Is this how Bella felt? Maybe Kyungsoo had been too quick to judge her for always asking Edward to turn her. </p><p> </p><p>“Sex doesn’t have to be about baby making.” The taller points out. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo snorts. “Obviously it won’t between the two of us<em> . </em>” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol steps closer, towering over Kyungsoo, pink hair falling into his eyes. “Obviously.”</p><p> </p><p>The hands on Kyungsoo’s hips aren’t unexpected, but the weight of them kind of was. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol holds him in a dark manner, heavy and possessive, silently letting Kyungsoo know that his bones could be crushed with a flick of a wrist. </p><p> </p><p>It was enlightening, feeling like this. Being at the mercy of a powerful being. </p><p> </p><p>Perhaps Chanyeol <em> should </em> fuck into Kyungsoo this time, force Kyungsoo to beg for it. </p><p> </p><p>It would be a nice change. </p><p> </p><p>But Kyungsoo still had to write that stupid paper.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol leans down, easily and effortlessly pressing Kyungsoo against his firm body. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol collides his lips against Kyungsoo’s, nothing like the sweet kiss from before. This one was consuming, determined, there was an electric charge between them causing Kyungsoo’s head to spin and he felt his bottom lip was taken in between Chanyeol’s, inhaling sharply when Chanyeol bit down. </p><p> </p><p>The pain is nothing of consequence but the <em> meaning </em> behind it caused a ringing in Kyungsoo’s ears, causing his heart to stutter and trip and be trampled.  </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol is taking control this time.</p><p> </p><p>It’s so evident in the way his hands grip tighter around Kyungsoo, clear in the way the demon forcefully presses his tongue against Kyungsoo’s lips, asking, no <em> demanding </em> entrance, and it’s <em> hot </em>. </p><p> </p><p>Lust fills Kyungsoo up to the brim and eventually spilling over, making itself known in the way Kyungsoo kisses back, pressing himself even more against Chanyeol’s body.</p><p> </p><p>Underneath the pale blue sweater, Chanyeol feels solid, his upper half felt so muscular and his chest and shoulders were broad and proud underneath. <em> Power </em>, so much power. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo breaks the kiss for the chance to breathe but it was futile because Chanyeol brings a hand to the back of Kyungsoo’s head, threading his fingers through the shorter’s black hair with raw <em> power </em> and <em> force </em>. Keeping him in place.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol kisses Kyungsoo again, taking pretty, plump lips, taking in a manner that suggests the demon is doing this because he <em> could.  </em></p><p> </p><p>Because Chanyeol owns Kyungsoo and could do– <em> will do </em>whatever he wants. </p><p> </p><p>And Kyungsoo for the first time in a long while, feels vulnerable. </p><p> </p><p>It’s a slightly uncomfortable feeling, it makes him want to squirm away and say something sarcastic or demand Chanyeol to fuck him. Things that don’t really require much emotional intervention. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol presses a bent knee in between Kyungsoo’s thighs, forcing Kyungsoo to separate his legs and Kyungsoo feels jolts of pleasure as the demon rubs his knee against Kyungsoo’s cock, who is quickly showing interest in the situation. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo kisses back with as much force as Chanyeol is giving him, allowing himself to give in for a moment, and bloom underneath the sensual touches from Chanyeol’s lips, tongue and knee, the big, strong hands slowly making their way underneath his shirt, splayed over Kyungsoo’s skin.</p><p> </p><p>Then he pushes Chanyeol away, not bothering to use much force, seeing as the taller would just absorb the energy.</p><p> </p><p>The demon releases Kyungsoo’s lips, surprised, a smacking sound filling the air between them. The hands underneath the shirt stayed and Kyungsoo didn’t mind.</p><p> </p><p> “What?” Chanyeol asks, low, <em> deep </em>.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol looks a little annoyed from being interrupted and Kyungsoo’s annoyed that <em> he </em> had to be the one to interrupt a good make out session.</p><p> </p><p>“I have a paper due today,” Kyungsoo informs the demon, stepping further back, hinting at Chanyeol to let go.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol ignores the hint, leaning down and pressing a soft kiss underneath the line of Kyungsoo’s jaw, soft and wet, a little sloppy but it felt really nice.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo really wants to say fuck it and indulge himself but for some <em> stupid </em>reason he wants it to be different somehow.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo doesn’t know. He doesn’t know what he’s getting at, doesn’t even know how to properly express the feelings sticking onto his heart with millions of pieces of the sun stored in there. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo turns his head away from Chanyeol’s kisses, “C’mon Chanyeol, I need to finish it.”</p><p> </p><p>Maybe he’s scared of having sex, now that there was more at stake. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol’s breath ghosts around the shell of Kyungsoo’s ear. “Do it <em> later </em>.” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo is a careful person.</p><p> </p><p>The type to not do anything unless he’s one hundred percent sure it will go in his favor. So he has absolutely no desire to tell Chanyeol how he feels. </p><p> </p><p>Besides, who is he to think he’s in love? Kyungsoo’s never been in love before. Five months isn’t enough time to fall in love.</p><p> </p><p>Maybe it’s all in his head.</p><p> </p><p>“No, Chanyeol.” Kyungsoo denies, finally stepping away from the arms around him. There is a slight rush of air, replacing Chanyeol’s warmth. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pouts. </p><p> </p><p>“But you were on TikTok.”</p><p> </p><p>“So?”</p><p> </p><p>“So, you were procrastinating.” The demon smiles, dark and promising. “Procrastinate some more.”</p><p> </p><p>“You’re horrible,” Kyungsoo replies, “Do you want me to fail?”</p><p> </p><p>“I’ll fuck you good and quick,” Chanyeol says with so much ease that it did things to Kyungsoo’s heart.</p><p> </p><p>The words make lust rise up again but it also makes Kyungsoo feel a little sad. He doesn’t want to be fucked quickly, he wants-</p><p> </p><p><em> What? To make love? </em> Kyungsoo scoffs internally. He doesn’t even <em> like </em> that phrase, it felt artificial. But <em> fuck </em> sounds too harsh. Meaningless <em> . </em>  </p><p> </p><p>Nothing involving Chanyeol would ever be meaningless to Kyungsoo. </p><p> </p><p>God, he sounds like a simp. </p><p> </p><p>“I believe you,” Kyungsoo replies. “You don’t last long, of course it’ll be quick.” He tries to strip his previous feelings of its significance.  </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol’s eyes flicker, blue running into the brown iris, white into the other one. The eye contact becomes more… <em> intimate </em>. Personal, pressing hard onto Kyungsoo’s soul. </p><p> </p><p>“I’ll show you <em> exactly </em> how long I can last.” </p><p> </p><p>“No thanks,” Kyungsoo says flatly, trying to tame his stupid heart that was currently running around with Jupiter and it’s moons.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol doesn’t push it any further and Kyungsoo doesn’t know if he should be relieved or disappointed. </p><p> </p><p>The demon sighs. “Fine, but hurry.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo rolls his eyes. “It’s a <em> paper </em> it’s going to take a while, Yeol.” He meets the demon's cool eyes. “Are there any demons that write papers that I could summon?”</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t summon anyone,” Chanyeol says quickly and sharply. “I’m the only demon you need. What’s the prompt? I can help.”</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t say things like that,” Kyungsoo replies, voice faint. </p><p> </p><p>Words like that, said in a manner that suggests Chanyeol wants Kyungsoo's total attention and feelings aren't good.</p><p> </p><p> It might make Kyungsoo fall deeper in love.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m a decent writer!” Chanyeol defends himself. He walks past Kyungsoo, towards the couch and discarded laptop. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo watches with fondness that felt a little out of place as the demon sat down, struggling to put his long legs underneath himself. </p><p> </p><p>And Kyungsoo allows himself to smile a bit. </p><p> </p><p>The sight is endearing. Everything about Chanyeol is just so<em> safe and lovely.  </em></p><p> </p><p>“Stop smiling and get your ass over here,” Chanyeol says with a lopsided smile of his own. “Just your ass, though.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, biting down on his lip at a terrible attempt of damage control upon his smile.  “I have more ass than you.” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol reaches down to grab Kyungsoo’s arm, pale sweater brushing against bare skin. He moves to the side, laptop on his knees sliding down a little, allowing Kyungsoo to adjust onto the cushions.</p><p> </p><p>“You like my ass though.” Chanyeol states, unaffected. </p><p> </p><p>He’s right, Kyungsoo likes it very much. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>One time, Chanyeol had asked about Kyungsoo’s dad.</p><p> </p><p>“He’s around, I think.” Kyungsoo replied, trying to be indifferent, ”I haven’t heard from him in years.” Kyungsoo swallowed back the strange tension that had built up in his throat. “Not that I care, he’s an addict and a manipulating, abusive asshole.”</p><p> </p><p>“He hit you?” Chanyeol had asked and his voice had taken on a dark tone.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo shook his head. “No, but it was emotionally abusive. He would yell all these fucked up things, would bang on my bedroom door and my mom wasn’t much help either you know?” </p><p> </p><p>He exhaled a shaky breath, watched it quake in the air. “She would say it was my fault he acted that way. Who says that to a fucking kid? But I forgave her, I mean she’s my <em> mom </em>, but as you know, I let go of that excuse a while ago.”</p><p> </p><p>He breathed in. “I was really lonely and sad and therapy didn’t help at all so I just went through it? I don’t know. The least they could have done was love me.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo felt Chanyeol’s eyes on him and it made him uncomfortable, hating how vulnerable he’s suddenly become. He didn’t want Chanyeol’s pity. He didn’t want reassurance or kind words, he didn’t know <em> what </em> he wanted other than to change the subject. Quick.</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t have parents,” Chanyeol spoke up, gently. “So I can’t give my opinion but…  I’m proud of you, Soo and I know how much it means to open up to someone and I’m really happy you trusted me.”</p><p> </p><p>In that moment, Kyungsoo paid attention to nothing but the gentle sighing of his heart.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“Done,” Kyungsoo says, a proud smile playing on his lips. He clicks the submission button and <em> Your work has been submitted </em> pops up. </p><p> </p><p>A wave of relief washes over him, the burden of the assignment lifted up. There’s another essay due later this week but that’s a problem for future Kyungsoo. </p><p> </p><p>“Really?” Chanyeol asks beside him, perking up. </p><p> </p><p>He stopped helping around the third page, annoyed by Nozick’s philosophy, unwilling to read anymore about it. Kyungsoo agreed, Nozick very obviously had no idea how income taxes work, among other things, but his philosophy professor was a Nozick fanatic. Kyungsoo isn’t above kissing a little bit of ass. </p><p> </p><p>He does it to Chanyeol all the time, literally, so what’s the difference if it’s figuratively?</p><p> </p><p>“Really.” Kyungsoo replies, a bit flat, distracted as he closes all of his research tabs. So, so satisfying. </p><p> </p><p>A pair of large hands find their way onto Kyungsoo’s thigh and lower back. The touch sends shivers down Kyungsoo’s body, all the way down to his toes and into the earth. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol leans forward, his wide chest almost blocking Kyungsoo from moving away. His body heat is gentle and warm, like his hands and Kyungsoo wasn’t even mad when his heart stuttered. </p><p> </p><p>Still, Kyungsoo doesn’t move to face Chanyeol, not wanting to give in <em> that </em> easily. </p><p> </p><p>“Can we fuck now?” Chanyeol’s voice is low, deep, playful. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo finally looks at Chanyeol and he finds it very difficult to exhale all the dandelion petals that have settled in his lungs. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol wears a small smile, crooked, filled with promises of sensuality and pleasure. </p><p> </p><p>and Kyungsoo feels it; feels lust settling into his skin, his cheeks and the pit of his stomach. It's the usual reaction, but it isn't at the same time. It makes Kyungsoo's heart ache.</p><p> </p><p>There was a difference now, the lust was laced with feelings, a wonderful, pretty combination that Kyungsoo wants to savor for a long, long time. </p><p> </p><p>He studies Chanyeol’s features for the amount of time it takes for an eclipse to end, at the teasing smile, at the blue and white color of his eyes</p><p> </p><p> and Kyungsoo wants to paint a million pictures with everything that makes up <em> Chanyeol. </em></p><p> </p><p>And then Kyungsoo remembers what Chanyeol had said.  </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Can we fuck now? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Simple. Straightforward. Something that Kyungsoo would have found amusing and refreshing at some point but now, it only makes him feel awful, like the color of his soul is stipped away.</p><p> </p><p>It’s a harsh reminder.</p><p> </p><p>Of how Chanyeol didn’t feel the same way as Kyungsoo, of how he didn’t feel like a star exploded inside of him whenever he looks at Kyungsoo, or the violent beating of his heart whenever Kyungsoo says something, does anything. </p><p> </p><p>And Chanyeol didn’t have to. </p><p> </p><p><em> Kyungsoo </em> is the one who fell in love, the one who unfairly started to want all of Chanyeol’s touches to mean <em> more </em>. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo feels his heart fall apart as he strings together a smile and says, “Yes.”</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>He expected Chanyeol to jump him, to feel his touches and hot kisses, but all he does is look at him— a<em> ctually </em> looks at him. </p><p> </p><p>“Is something wrong?” Chanyeol asks, worried.</p><p> </p><p>The question burns Kyungsoo. Causes the wound in his heart to fester and his thoughts are screaming at him for being stupid, for being too fucking obvious. </p><p> </p><p>“Nothing,” Kyungsoo replies, too quick, too breathy.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol catches it and he removes his hands from Kyungsoo’s body, leaving behind a ghost of his touch. He shifts his body closer, more attentive. “What’s wrong, Soo?”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo bites the inside of his cheek. “It’s really nothing, Chanyeol.”</p><p> </p><p>He closes his laptop and turns, tucking it behind a couch cushion, quickly facing Chanyeol again. Kyungsoo studies the pink hair, the wide eyes filled with concern, concern that made his heart rate pick up but it shouldn’t be there. </p><p> </p><p>That concern gave Kyungsoo false hope. Chanyeol is probably asking to be polite and so Kyungsoo decides to give Chanyeol a break. </p><p> </p><p>“Everything’s fine,” Kyungsoo says once more. He puts on a smirk, “C’mon let’s go to the bedroom. Unless you don’t mind being fucked into the couch.”</p><p> </p><p>A subtle but clear hint that Kyungsoo is going to top this time. </p><p> </p><p>To him, bottoming is slightly more intimate, more exposing and to bottom while struggling to keep from displaying his heart would be too much emotionally. He wouldn’t be able to handle the pressure of it.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol is silent for a heart beat too long and Kyungsoo adds, “Trying to dominate me earlier was cute but–”</p><p> </p><p>“Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol interrupts, his eyes, his tone, firm. “Don’t do that.”</p><p> </p><p>“Do what?”</p><p> </p><p>“You know <em> what </em>.” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo remembers that Chanyeol knows about his coping mechanism, about his reluctance to have someone care for him. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol continues, saving Kyungsoo from trying to explain himself. “Something’s bothering you, like a shift happened inside of you. I thought you trusted me enough to <em> talk </em> to me.” </p><p> </p><p>He sounds hurt.</p><p> </p><p>“I do!” Kyungsoo says, defensive, slightly agitated and uncomfortable. “I trust you, I really do but it’s nothing, seriously, stop insisting about it.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m only insisting because you’re lying.”</p><p> </p><p>“Why do you even care?” Kyungsoo says, bitterness lodged somewhere in his throat, underneath his tongue. </p><p> </p><p>He’s bitter and angry at Chanyeol’s questions, at his words that do nothing other than fuel Kyungsoo’s raging feelings and make him believe that Chanyeol cares as well. </p><p> </p><p>And Chanyeol stays silent, allowing the seconds to tick by.</p><p> </p><p>He looks conflicted. Like he wants to say something.</p><p> </p><p>Anticipation and hope stretches across Kyungsoo’s chest and in an effort to save himself, he says, “If we don’t start kissing soon, I’m going to be turned off for the rest of the day.”</p><p> </p><p>It’s a joke, a bad one, not funny at all but it does its job. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Hot, wet, sensual kisses are shared between them and Kyungsoo feels overwhelmed, like there’s a heavy weight on top of his chest, as if a piece of the sky has fallen on top of him; the weight of all of his fucking feelings.</p><p> </p><p>And Kyungsoo’s heart is struggling, suffocating and gasping everytime Chanyeol’s tongue meets his own, at every wet swipe on Kyungsoo’s lips that sends quivering jolts of pleasure through his body, filling in the empty spaces in between Kyungsoo’s bones. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol brings them into the bedroom, trapping Kyungsoo in between soft sheets and the hardness of his bare chest, large hands on Kyungsoo’s waist, sliding underneath Kyungsoo’s shirt. </p><p> </p><p>They parted, left enough space in between their lips for a ray of sunshine to fit through as Kyungsoo slips off his shirt over his head. </p><p> </p><p>And then Chanyeol’s hands are <em> everywhere </em>, sliding up and down Kyungsoo’s stomach, catching on the swell of his hips and fingers brushing his nipples, twisting them gently, rolling them like the waves in the ocean.</p><p> </p><p>The kisses never stop, even when they break into small ones that trail along Kyungsoo’s jaw line, leaving a constellation, pressed down by Chanyeol’s tongue as Kyungsoo runs his hands over Chanyeol’s chest and his shoulders, <em> god those arms </em> , and Kyungsoo feels like he’s inches, <em> moments </em> away from spontaneous combustion.</p><p> </p><p>Everything feels intimate, like Chanyeol is taking his time, making every effort to make Kyungsoo feel <em> everything. </em></p><p> </p><p><em> This is so unfair </em>, Kyungsoo thinks, as his mouth opens, accepting Chanyeol’s tongue once more. A large, heavy hand presses itself against Kyungsoo’s back, fingers gently brushing over the lines of his spine.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo is suddenly overwhelmed, touched so deeply and gently that he finds himself swallowing back unexpected tears. It becomes harder to breathe, but easy at the same time; each stuttering breath he takes in is filled with nothing but <em> Chanyeol, Chanyeol, Chanyeol. </em></p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo lets out a whimper, surprising himself and the sound dances into Chanyeol’s mouth.</p><p> </p><p>And then Chanyeol is gone, his lips hovering above him, putting the solar system and the universe in between them and Kyungsoo <em> hates </em> it but he’s grateful at the same time because he needs to get a <em> grip </em>. </p><p> </p><p>To Chanyeol, this isn’t any different from all those other times. It’s just <em> sex </em> to him. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo meets Chanyeol’s eyes, fresh white clouds next to a pretty apatite stone and says, “Don’t stop.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol shakes his head. </p><p> </p><p>“What’s wrong, Soo?” Chanyeol murmurs, low, heavy, intense, <em> raw </em>, and Kyungsoo feels like shattering. </p><p> </p><p>“Nothing.” Kyungsoo tries to sound indifferent, but it’s hard when it feels like the sun and the moon have merged together and thousands of flower petals are seeping into his skin but there’s also a heavy feeling. </p><p> </p><p>Insecurity. Sadness. Cowardness. </p><p> </p><p>“Keep going.” He insists.</p><p> </p><p>“No.” Chanyeol replies, his voice and eyes firm. Concerned.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo sighs, tries to play it like he’s annoyed when really, he’s uncomfortable with how intense this feels. It’s been so long since he’s felt something like this. Something remotely <em> real. </em></p><p> </p><p>“You were doing just <em> fine </em> a few seconds ago–”</p><p> </p><p>A light scoff cuts Kyungsoo off. “Did you really think I was going to have sex with you when you’re clearly not in the right mindset?” Chanyeol takes a tight breath. “What do you take me as, Soo?”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Kyungsoo whispers, ashamed but also relieved somehow, even though that relief was borderline fear.</p><p> </p><p>Fear of slipping up, of letting Chanyeol know that he’s in love with him, probably has been since the beginning. </p><p> </p><p>“You don’t need to apologize. I’m not mad,” Chanyeol says, soft, deep. “<em> I’m worried </em>.”</p><p> </p><p>And then Kyungsoo’s face is in Chanyeol’s hands, cradled so gently, it’s warm tenderness seeping into his cheeks. Chanyeol’s eyes, blue and white, look like a piece of the sun dropped into them, warming them up with something raw. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo is <em> almost </em> convinced it's fondness. </p><p> </p><p>Adoration maybe. </p><p> </p><p>“I really meant it earlier, Soo. I want you to trust me.” </p><p> </p><p>“I don’t want to burden you.” Kyungsoo avoids Chanyeol’s eyes, he didn’t want to make a complete fool out of himself, didn’t want to put his heart out, lay it bare, only to be rejected, for Chanyeol to say <em> no </em>– </p><p> </p><p>“<em> Look at me </em>,” Chanyeol breathes out, voice soft and heavy at the same time. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo forces himself to lock eyes and Chanyeol looks at him for so long that he starts to blush, the heat of Chanyeol’s tender, large hands and his body pressing against Kyungsoo’s is burning, traveling through his body and causing him to drown in an ocean of emotions. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol caresses Kyungsoo’s lips with his thumb, eyes heavy, swirling with all the matter that makes up a galaxy. “Your feelings are valid and I want to hear all of them, if you’ll let me.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo feels like a star has exploded inside of him, uncontrollable intensity and<em> he’s really fucking happy right now. </em> </p><p> </p><p><em> I love him, </em>Kyungsoo thinks, heart picking up, jerking almost violently. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> This is so unfair </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“Soo?” Chanyeol’s voice washes over Kyungsoo’s face, and his thumb keeps caressing Kyungsoo’s cheeks and lips, pressing something that feels like adoration deep into his skin. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo desperately wants to press his lips on every part of Chanyeol, savor the strength of his body, the taste of his skin, the beating of his heart. He wants to breathe in all of Chanyeol’s warmth and reassurance that he’s come to rely on. </p><p> </p><p>And then he remembers that Chanyeol is able to feel others' emotions.</p><p> </p><p>He knows, Kyungsoo realizes. He has to.</p><p> </p><p>It’s alright somehow. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo is too much of a coward to voice out the echoes in his ribcage but maybe Chanyeol will be nice enough to not say anything and let Kyungsoo love him quietly. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol continues to study Kyungsoo with worry and something that looks like fondness and <em> affection </em>.</p><p> </p><p>“Stop touching me with your eyes.” Kyungsoo’s voice is a strangled, overwhelmed whisper. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m not doing anything.” Chanyeol whispers back, voice deep, soothing, and it didn’t help Kyungsoo <em> at all </em>, it only makes him feel worse, causing the warmth to crack open his soul.</p><p> </p><p>“Liar.” Kyungsoo tells him, throat tight, heart shaky. “You’re looking at me like you <em> care </em> about me. <em> Really </em> care about me.”</p><p> </p><p>“<em> That’s because I do. </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo chokes. “<em> What? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol lets out a small sigh and he leans his face closer, the distance between the moon and the sun just before an eclipse and breathes out, “I’m in love with you, Soo.” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo exhales suddenly, shaky, uneven and his heart is groaning and sighing and convulsing all at the same time and all that slips out of his mouth is, “Have you ever been in love?” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol doesn’t seem surprised by the question, doesn’t look discouraged. “Once. Maybe twice.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’ve never been in love,” Kyungsoo whispers and then he breathes in a tight breath, filled with hope and vulnerability. “I think I’m in love with you, Chanyeol.” </p><p> </p><p>The hands engulfing Kyungsoo’s face are reassuring, the thumb pressed against the corner of his lips left behind warmth and adoration, matching Chanyeol’s eyes, the same eyes that kept touching his heart. </p><p> </p><p>“I’ll take care of you,” Chanyeol tells him, softly, deep and warm. “I won’t hurt you, Soo. I promise<em> . </em>”</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Kyungsoo gasps, completely naked, feeling heart pounding so hard against his ribs that he fears it’ll leave bruises. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol is leaving his own mark on Kyungsoo, sucking and biting a spot on Kyungsoo's inner thighs, pressing his tongue against the irritated skin, gentle, soothing. </p><p> </p><p>There is a firm hand on Kyungsoo’s hip, another lifting his leg up slightly, both are holding him down, making him take everything that Chanyeol is giving him.</p><p> </p><p>Suddenly Chanyeol lifts himself up, Kyungsoo <em> feels </em> it rather than sees it and he’s about to lift his head up from the pillow when he feels a wet warmth engulf his cock.</p><p> </p><p><em> Oh, </em> Kyungsoo thinks as pleasure hits him in harsh waves. Chanyeol swirls his tongue and Kyungsoo reaches down, sliding his fingers into soft hair and gripping <em> hard </em>. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol moans, vibrations quivering up Kyungsoo’s body, breaking his bones apart.</p><p> </p><p>Everything is on fire. </p><p> </p><p>His cheeks, his thighs, the pit of his stomach and he’s drowning in waves of emotion and he shuts his eyes and tells himself that it’s just a blow job, that it’s one of many and then the wet warmth is gone, cold air is hitting his cock, surprising him enough to loosen his grip on Chanyeol’s hair. </p><p> </p><p>But Chanyeol doesn’t go up as Kyungsoo had expected. He starts caressing Kyungsoo’s hip, pressing 13 summer days into his skin, Chanyeol’s lips are pressing along his hip bone, gently and <em> he’s never done this before. </em> </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo bites the inside of his cheek, pleasure burning the back of his throat and he doesn’t know what to think because it all feels so intimate somehow.</p><p> </p><p>Like Chanyeol was kissing away the pain, his insecurities, removing all of his doubts and fears.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Chanyeol kisses with so much emotion that Kyungsoo nearly cracks in half.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo is holding Chanyeol’s face in the same manner his own face is being held but while Chanyeol’s hands are big and warm and steady, Kyungsoo swears there’s a tremble in his own touch. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol brushes his tongue against Kyungsoos, initiating a dance and Kyungsoo's heart mimics the movements. With Chanyeol hovering above him, pressing the bare lines of his body, Kyungsoo can’t help but become soft, pliant, melting underneath the strength of Chanyeol’s hands, his arms, his chest, the way in which he works Kyungsoo's mouth open. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol tastes like starlight and intensity and then he leans back, enough for two, three stars to pass through, eyes hazy, hair disheveled. Kyungsoo is about to ask, <em> beg </em> Chanyeol to come back, to keep splitting him open and fill him up with sunshine and adoration, when he feels a gentle pressure on his lower lip.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol’s thumb is pressing against the plushness of kyungsoo’s lip, teasingly, almost forcing his mouth to open but not <em> quite. </em> It was a show of strength, of control and it caused lust to surge through Kyungsoo’s body, twisting. Suddenly, Kyungsoo has the urge to be fucked, hard, fast— </p><p> </p><p>But then—</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol looks down at him with half-lidded eyes, with awe and care swirling within them.</p><p> </p><p>“Why are you looking at me like that?” Kyungsoo whispers, lips swollen and heavy underneath the pressure of Chanyeol’s thumb. Of his fondness. “Like it’s our first time doing this.”</p><p> </p><p>“Because I love you,” Chanyeol says effortlessly, as if he can’t <em> hear </em> Kyungsoo’s heart struggling to exhale. “And because you deserve to be looked at, <em> worshiped </em>, told how pretty you are.”</p><p> </p><p>He swipes his thumb across Kyungsoo’s lips, pressing something that feels like summer and reassurance into them. “<em> You’re so pretty </em>,” He says, quietly. </p><p> </p><p>There is a storm of fresh rain in Kyungsoo’s lungs along with the pulsating reminder that it’s going to be different this time and every other time to come. He finds himself struggling, struggling to inhale, to try to see himself as Chanyeol does. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo tries to come up with something to say but his lips remain shut because he’s not as good with words as Chanyeol is, because there will never be enough words to describe the intensity of this moment.</p><p> </p><p>He kisses Chanyeol, pulling him down and Chanyeol kisses back with a want so desperate it burns as Kyungsoo tries to swallow it down. Chanyeol forces Kyungsoo’s mouth to open wider, removing his thumb and a hand starts tracing the lines of Kyungsoo’s neck, his jaw, the grooves of collarbones, his shoulders. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo is being touched here, there, <em> everywhere; </em>gentle, warm, large hands against his nipples, the fingers brushing them, twisting them in time with the tongue in Kyungsoo’s mouth, quick and electric. </p><p> </p><p>And Kyungsoo touches Chanyeol as well, moves his hands from Chanyeol’s face downward, touching broad shoulders, pressing against a strong back, flirting touches on Chanyeol’s lower stomach, teasingly brushing the happy trail.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol bites down on Kyungsoo’s bottom lip, beautifully painful and Kyungsoo decides that he can’t wait anymore, he wants Chanyeol <em> now, </em>he wants those lips on his rim, those fingers, that cock inside of him. He wants to feel like thousands of suns are being pressed into his skin </p><p> </p><p>and he wants Chanyeol to hold his heart.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo pulls back, lips wet and swollen.</p><p> </p><p>“<em> Chanyeol </em>,”  he exhales, shakily. “I need you.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not done tasting you,” Chanyeol whispers, holding Kyungsoo's gaze. “I’m just starting.”</p><p> </p><p>He drops his gaze, seemingly delighted at the sight of Kyungsoo’s red lips. His nose grazes against Kyungsoo’s and Kyungsoo is able to count the millimeters and moons in between their lips. </p><p> </p><p>“Why do you keep doing that?” Kyungsoo says, dropping his eyes, feeling the beginning of a blush. His hands on Chanyeol’s waist tremble a little. </p><p> </p><p>“Doing what?” Chanyeol asks softly, his hands suddenly moving up Kyungsoo’s back. There’s a teasing tilt to his words, in his pretty almond eyes, on his eyebrows and the curve of his lips.</p><p> </p><p>“You’re making me fall in love with you even more,” Kyungsoo tells him. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol smiles, softly, so devastatingly <em> shy </em> that Kyungsoo feels suspended in the moment.</p><p> </p><p>“Really?” Chanyeol asks, so happy, so prettily, so bashful as if they aren’t naked, as if his cock isn’t pressed heavily against the inside of Kyungsoo’s thigh and Kyungsoo’s thighs and lower stomach aren’t covered in red, slightly purple bites. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo feels like he’s spinning, and he’s not breathing, he needs oxygen, he needs to find his lungs—</p><p> </p><p>“Yes,” he tells Chanyeol. “And I appreciate what you’re trying to do but right now,” Kyungsoo swallows, lust and something that tastes like desperation burns his throat. “Right now, I want to be fucked. Then I’ll memorize every inch of your body with my lips” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol exhales suddenly, uneven, shaky. </p><p> </p><p>The hands on Kyungsoo’s back adopt a possessive manner as they press Kyungsoo closer. He feels their cocks brush against each other and he resists the urge to wrap his splayed legs around Chanyeol’s waist, to mold himself around Chanyeol’s silhouette. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo feels lips pressing against his ear, hears a heavy <em> okay </em> and a soft <em> I love you </em> settle within his aching soul <em> , </em> and he feels alive, very much alive. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Kyungsoo feels the pad of Chanyeol’s lube-covered finger circling against his rim, teasingly, as if he had all the time in the world, as if Kyungsoo isn’t falling apart underneath him. </p><p> </p><p>The finger makes its way inside of Kyungsoo, unapologetically thick, penetrating him and there’s a bit of resistance because it’s been so long since Kyungsoo has laid beneath Chanyeol like this, thick thighs spread and pressed upward, hands grasping the sheets, <em> taking it. </em></p><p> </p><p>He feels exposed, insecure—</p><p> </p><p>“Fuck you’re so pretty,” Chanyeol murmurs from above him, “so pretty, so beautiful for me.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo meets Chanyeol’s heavy gaze, his heart jerking backwards, falling apart, and there’s a planet spinning out of its orbit and the raw feeling of being <em> loved </em> grips Kyungsoo by the base of his spine. </p><p> </p><p>Another finger presses against his rim and it slides past the puckered skin, sits smugly within Kyungsoo and a soft moan of, “You’re doing so well,” settles on Kyungsoo’s cheeks and turns into a dusty pink.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo wants to say something, wants to voice out the feelings in his heart that’s pounding against his ribcage, threatening to break the twenty-four bones. He wants to press his lips to every part of Chanyeol, wants to savor the scent of his skin, the throbbing of his heart.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol kisses “I’m going to put in two more, okay?” onto Kyungsoo’s swollen lips.</p><p> </p><p><em> Wait, </em> Kyungsoo thinks, <em> that might be too much— </em></p><p> </p><p>He gasps, strangled and then he moans loudly, deep like a new moon. The thick, long fingers thrust in, spread apart and Kyungsoo digs his fingernails into the taunt, golden skin of Chanyeol’s back. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo thinks he hears Chanyeol moan as well, face pressing against his cheek, broad shoulders and chest enveloping him but Kyungsoo is too engrossed with the warm bubbles rising within him to notice. </p><p> </p><p>The stretch is agonizingly <em> wonderful </em>and Kyungsoo tries to spread his legs but he can’t, trapped by Chanyeol’s body above him.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol seemingly got a hint because suddenly there’s a rush of cold air where he used to be and Kyungsoo looks up to see Chanyeol on his knees, his free hand gripping Kyungsoo’s thighs so tightly that the skin spilled from in between his fingers. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo feels his leg being lifted up and then it’s on Chanyeol’s shoulder and he feels even more exposed, the four fingers in him seem to reach <em> deeper </em>. The sight of Chanyeol’s arm, taut and muscular moving in and out, in sequence with the strong fingers disappearing in and out caused the world to fade into the background.</p><p> </p><p>“I wish you could see yourself right now,” Chanyeol suddenly says, deep, rough, barely restrained by the clear desire in his voice, on grooves of his taut muscles. “You look so good, so pilant, <em> gorgeous.” </em></p><p> </p><p>The words, “No I’m not,” fall out of Kyungsoo lips without a second thought.</p><p> </p><p>And then Chanyeol is above Kyungsoo once again, fingers having slid past Kyungsoo's rim so quickly he barely registers it. </p><p> </p><p>There are hands holding Kyungsoo’s cheeks, big, warm, wet from the lube and Chanyeol’s blue and white eyes are holding so much concern, so much fondness and adoration that the weight of it feels like bricks upon Kyungsoo’s chest. </p><p> </p><p>“Don’t say that,” Chanyeol says, soft, reprimanding. </p><p> </p><p>“It’s true,” Kyungsoo finds himself saying, feeling a little uncomfortable, unused to having so much care directed towards him.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pulls back a little, determination pressed against his furrowed eyebrows. “It’s not true,” he insists, his voice deep, firm. “And I’ll make you believe it Soo, I swear.” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo's joints feel flimsy, he wants to shove aside the space in between them and he finds himself believing Chanyeol. </p><p> </p><p>“I don’t think,” Kyungsoo tells him, struggling, breaking apart, “anyone has cared for me as much as you do.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol’s thumbs brush against Kyungsoo’s cheeks, pressing down rose petals dipped in reassurance. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p><em> “Chanyeol!” </em>Kyungsoo gasps, his fingers intertwined with pink hair and his thighs start to shake from the pleasure of being eaten out. </p><p> </p><p>The large, firm hands holding his thighs up gripped harder, fingers imprinting onto Kyungsoo’s skin and adding to the sensations that were traveling up his spine.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol continues to press his tongue against the puckered rim, tracing, licking, using his teeth to gently, carefully graze the skin. His nose is pressing against Kyungsoo’s balls and everything is <em> wet </em>, hot, as if Kyungsoo is being dumped into a hot bath. </p><p> </p><p>Sounds continue to fall from Kyungsoo’s swollen lips, moans, whimpers, his vocal cords straining against the words <em> yes yes please more more I need more god don’t fucking stop! </em></p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo thinks he hears a light chuckle as Chanyeol presses his tongue flat against the rim, as he pushes his tongue inside, flickering, drawing out Kyungsoo’s pleasure, drawing out sounds.</p><p> </p><p>There is a tightening within Kyungsoo’s lower stomach, it’s heavy, undeniable, and his chest is heaving and hands are tightening around the sheets. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m going to cum,” he tells Chanyeol. There's an urge to wrap his hand around his cock and stroke himself but he wants to get off from Chanyeol only, wants to feel what stars feel as they sigh their last breath.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol removes his mouth and Kyungsoo feels like <em> crying </em>, he wants that warmth, that wetness back—</p><p> </p><p>Two, three fingers are pushed past his rim, thick, steady and Kyungsoo arches his back and every vertebra, every knuckle, his <em> hips </em> are trembling. There is one hand holding him down, another was reaching deep within him and then where are wet kisses again, on Kyungsoo’s thighs, the underside of his cock, soft peaks on the tip. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo can’t stop all those whimpers dripping out of his lips, sliding down the tense line of his throat and pooling in the crevices of his collar bones. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo cums.</p><p> </p><p>There’s something about the way he can’t stop gasping, the way his chest is rising up and down, too fast for the sun to keep up. There’s a momentary stillness where the only thing moving is his heart, ringing in his ears.</p><p> </p><p>There’s warm cum on his stomach and his breathing is harsh, a complete contrast to Chanyeol’s hands that are gently stroking, caressing Kyungsoo’s skin, soothing, creating a language of their own and writing stories on Kyungsoo’s body. </p><p> </p><p>For some stupid reason, there’s a prickling feeling behind his eyes, as if he’s about to <em> cry </em> and it’s so, so stupid, such an unnecessary feeling</p><p> </p><p>and it becomes worse when Chanyeol starts to press his lips <em> everywhere, </em>brushing two plump clouds on Kyungsoo’s thighs, the edge of his waist, a tiny bite underneath his belly button. It takes Kyungsoo a moment and a sunrise to realize Chanyeol is licking the cum off of his stomach.</p><p> </p><p>He starts to lift himself up from the bed, saying, “You don’t have to—!” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol cuts Kyungsoo off with a rough, “I want to,” reaches an arm up and presses his thumb onto Kyungsoo’s lips, still for a millisecond and then he pushes it inside of Kyungsoo’s mouth. It’s an example of raw strength, of how <em> powerful </em> Chanyeol is, how he can break all the bones in Kyungsoo’s body with a mere flick of his wrist.</p><p> </p><p>It’s <em> hot </em>.</p><p> </p><p>With this feeling of vulnerability and the jolts of pleasure from Chanyeol tongue lapping up his cum, Kyungsoo twirls his tongue around Chanyeol’s thumb, eyes rolling back. </p><p>  </p><p>It occurs to him that Chanyeol has never done this. He’s not afraid to swallow Kyungsoo cum when he gives head but usually, he does some gesture and all the cum, the sweat, saliva on their bodies would disappear. </p><p> </p><p>It’s as if Chanyeol really meant what he said, really wants to kiss and take everything Kyungsoo has to offer, wants to love all of him, wants Kyungsoo to love himself. It’s intimate, it’s so hot and sweet, filling Kyungsoo up with a heavy, unbelievable sensation so much that it’s the only thing keeping him from floating away.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“Chanyeol.” Kyungsoo gasps, still struggling to fill his lungs.</p><p> </p><p>“What is it?” Chanyeol asks, lowly, clenching his jaw, visibly struggling as Kyungsoo strokes his cock up and down. </p><p> </p><p>Kyugnsoo is still on his back, with Chanyeol hovering above him, supporting himself with his strong, muscular forearms. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo hesitates, heart jerking, from post orgasm, from feeling Chanyeol’s cock, thick, ready to accept him. From how fucking <em> handsome </em>Chanyeol looks right now, sweat on his hairline, throat, chest, arms tense, pleasure tracing itself on the lines of his body. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol leans forward, pressing his face into the crook of Kyungsoo’s neck, licks, once, twice, and Kyungsoo stops his stroking because of the distraction. Because of the heavy, unbelievable sensation being underneath Chanyeol like this. </p><p> </p><p>“What do you wanna tell me, Soo?” Chanyeol says, his lips so close to Kyungsoo’s ear, his voice low. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo swallows tightly. “I was wondering if…” He bites his bottom lip, looking up to the ceiling, not knowing why he’s become so hesitant all of a sudden. “I was wondering if we could skip the condom?” </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol lifts his face up, meeting Kyungsoo’s eyes. “Oh,” is all he says.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo rushes to say something else, to relieve himself of the embarrassment pricking his body. “I’m clean, if that’s what you’re worried about. And–” He swallows down a blush. “And I’ve only been sleeping with you so the chance of me having anything is non-existent–”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not accusing you, Soo.” Chanyeol says, his tone soft, non-accusing. “I just didn’t expect that?” </p><p> </p><p>“Oh,” Kyungsoo says in an eloquent manner. It’s embarrassing and everything he had wished to say is replaced with, “Nevermind. Lets just… continue?”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol gave him a tiny smile, apparently amused by Kyungsoo’s embarrassment. “Can I ask why you want me to cum inside of you?”</p><p> </p><p>There’s something about the way Chanyeol’s deep voice catches on the word <em> cum. </em> </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo breaks the bridge between his and Chanyeol’s eyes. “I’ve never– I want to know how it feels and–” <em> God why is this so difficult?  </em></p><p> </p><p>“Just say it,” Chanyeol tells him, soft, sincere. Kyungsoo’s heart jumps in his throat and there’s an overflow of something that feels like love for this man within his chest. </p><p> </p><p>“I just want to feel everything with you.” Kyungsoo tells him, soft, tender and vulnerable. “I want to do everything I can with you, Yeol.”</p><p> </p><p>Silence the weight of Mars. </p><p> </p><p>Then,</p><p> </p><p>“Yeol?” Chanyeol says, a teasing smile dancing on his face. “Not very creative you know.”</p><p> </p><p>“As if Soo is any better,” Kyungsoo tells him, grateful for some banter, for the handful of seconds he has to get his heart back in order and brush off the rose petals on his cheeks. </p><p> </p><p>“You hurt me,” Chanyeol pouts and it feels so out of place with his heavy cock pressing smugly against Kyungsoo’s inner thighs.  </p><p> </p><p>“You hurt me first.” Kyungsoo’s heart pounds. “So… what do you think?”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol leans down, tilts his head to the side and presses his full lips against Kyungsoo’s.</p><p> </p><p>The kiss starts off soft, a whisper almost and then it takes shape, with every swipe of Chanyeol’s tongue, working Kyungsoo’s mouth, nibbling on his lips. Kyungsoo gets the urge to rub his thighs together, to get some friction on his cock and Chanyeol keeps swirling his tongue in Kyungsoo’s mouth, tasting him, forcing him to swallow a desperate want.</p><p> </p><p>They part with wet lips, hazy eyes and Chanyeol’s deep, <em> “Let’s do it,” </em> settling within the non-existent space in between them. </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Chanyeol fingers Kyungsoo a little bit more.</p><p> </p><p>He claims it's to avoid hurting Kyungsoo but Kyungsoo thinks Chanyeol just wants to draw out the tortuous pleasure, rile him up even further. It’s unfair to be honest. </p><p> </p><p>“Chan, just fuck me already please?” Kyungsoo moans out, lifting his body up, reaching out and tangling his fingers within pink strands. </p><p> </p><p>“Oh, so it’s Chan now?” He asks with a smile on his face as he slips his fingers out of Kyungsoo. It leaves behind an awful, empty feeling. </p><p> </p><p>“It’ll be nothing if you don’t get this show on the road.”</p><p> </p><p>“What a weak comeback,” Chanyeol tells Kyungsoo as he brings them face to face. “You can do better, Soo.”</p><p> </p><p>“If you’re not going to fuck me, then move so I can go with someone who <em> can </em>.”</p><p> </p><p>“Is that supposed to make me jealous?” There’s a tension clinging onto Chanyeol’s words. </p><p> </p><p>Normally, Kyungsoo wouldn’t let go of this opportunity but there’s really no point. They’re aware of each other’s feelings and if he continues, they might get into a pointless argument and Kyungsoo can <em> not </em> afford to be blue balled right now. </p><p> </p><p>“<em> Chanyeol </em>,” Kyungsoo begs, taking on a more desperate tone, one that he knows Chanyeol won’t be able to resist. He parts his lips, sticks his tongue out slightly, lifts his leg and presses his thighs against the bare, golden skin of Chanyeol’s waist. Tension rises between them, melting into warm honey.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol exhales suddenly, shaky, uneven. </p><p> </p><p>“Okay.” He says, devastatingly deep. Then: “Fuck, everything about you is so pretty.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo swallows hard, he shatters and it takes a moment before he can say thank you.</p><p> </p><p>“You’re welcome,” Chanyeol says. He drops his face a little, grazing his nose alongK yungsoo’s cheek. He presses his lips against Kyungsoo’s ear and says deeply, “Turn around.”</p><p><br/>
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</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Steady hands on his hips. The press of Chanyeol’s cock on the curve of his ass, heavy and hard.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo breathes out, holding himself up by his forearms, head hanging down, not finding it within himself to look upward. It takes so much effort to <em> breathe </em> because his stupid heart is pounding so hard from anticipation that he’s convinced one of his lungs has been taken out.</p><p> </p><p>His cock is <em> aching </em>, he feels like his stretched out rim is fluttering. There’s a current of anticipation running through his body, pressing close to him, grazing his neck. Kyungsoo feels like any touch, kiss, breath upon his body by Chanyeol will cause his body to snap in half.</p><p> </p><p>It’s no longer just sex, it’s more, it’s <em> everything– </em> everything feels different. Being around so much love, adoration, and tenderness has managed to thaw Kyungsoo into something human. Into someone who can trust another person without any concerns, someone who can <em> love </em> despite their lack of physical contact with that petrifying feeling.</p><p> </p><p>“Chanyeol?” Kyungsoo calls out, hands gripping the bed sheets, heart unraveling, the world blurring away. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol hums, deep and sensual.</p><p> </p><p>“I love you.” Kyungsoo says, feeling ridiculously vulnerable. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol’s hands roam and they travel upward, spreading sunlight that fills up the dark room. He feels the flair of Kyungsoo’s hips, the inward curve of his waist, the steadiness of his spine. Kyungsoo feels Chanyeol’s thumb swiping across his skin, the handful of moles and then there’s great warmth hovering above his body.</p><p> </p><p> A chest so close to his back, a mere handful of planets away and then familiar, soft lips on the back of his neck. A warm, wet sensation that caused a shiver to go down Kyungsoo’s spine, leaving behind desire and the feeling of being alive. </p><p> </p><p>“I love you too.” Chanyeol presses those words onto the outer shell of Kyungsoo’s ear.</p><p> </p><p>The warmth hovering over Kyungsoo’s back disappears, on large hand is on his hip, the other is spreading his cheeks </p><p> </p><p>and Kyungsoo gasps, whimpers as Chanyeol’s cock presses within him, stretching his rim, forcing Kyungsoo’s walls to shape around its length and thickness. There’s something about being slowly worked open after a long time that makes Kyungsoo become a little unfocused and it takes him a moment to realize that he’s moaning out loud and it’s <em> embarrassing </em>.</p><p> </p><p>Until Chanyeol moans out something that sounds like <em> fuck </em>and Kyungsoo raises his hips a little higher, arches his back a little lower. He isn’t going to deny the pride that burns into his skin.</p><p> </p><p>When Chanyeol is pushed all the way in, when hip bones kiss the swell of his ass, Kyungsoo feels full and his chest is heaving, breathing shallow and he thinks he mutters something like, “<em> Move.” </em></p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pulls out, drags his cock in a manner that threatens to drive Kyungsoo insane and he snaps his hips forward, <em> hard </em> . And he does it <em> again again again—fuck keep going, oh god!  </em></p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol is unforgiving with his pace, with the manner in which he makes Kyungsoo <em> feel </em>it, the manner in which he uses his strength. One hand on Kyungsoo’s hip, another hand positioned higher, a thumb close to his spine, long, thick fingers splayed on Kyungsoo’s stomach, soft skin gently spilling from in between the spaces of his fingers and it’s almost as if Chanyeol wants to feel the outline of his cock there, evidence of his reach. </p><p> </p><p>There’s raw power coursing through Chanyeol, it’s harsh, pleasantly rough and he keeps going and going and going, pushing, pulling, making Kyungsoo take it and <em> God </em> does Kyungsoo take it. </p><p> </p><p>He takes it wonderfully, his legs shake in a delightful manner, moans fall from in between his plush, swollen lips so prettily, so <em> loud. </em>The speed and power from Chanyeol’s thrust causes Kyungsoo’s body to move forward and back. The possessiveness of Chanyeol’s hand leaves behind an imprint so deep that desire pools within it’s crevices. </p><p> </p><p><em> Chanyeol, Chanyeol, keep going, you’re fucking me so good! </em> fills the room, intertwining with impossibly deep moans, along with something that feels like <em> you’re taking me so well. </em> </p><p> </p><p>Then large hands travel up, fingers brush against Kyungsoo’s perky nipples, the poor things pathetically forgotten. Chanyeol plays with them, rolls them in between his fingers as his cock continues to penetrate Kyungsoo, pressing so deep that Kyungsoo sees stars and there are three suns and a butterfly or two. </p><p> </p><p>It’s exhilarating, being touched like this, being <em> fucked </em> like this. </p><p> </p><p>They push and pull, draw out each other’s pressure and then Kyungsoo is flipped over, his leg raised high. Chanyeol pushes his cock in again, and the tan hollow of his throat, his chest is sweaty and his eyes are closed, lost in pleasure, lost in the same feeling that is surging throughout Kyungsoo’s body.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo breaks open his mouth, moans, whimpers, cries out and he closes his eyes for a moment but then he opens them again. He wants to see Chanyeol, wants to see the highs of his cheekbones, the soft clouds that make up his lips. It makes Kyungsoo fill with pride, it makes his stuttering heart break apart.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol opens his eyes, dark and unfocused. Kyungsoo feels the pleasure in his lower stomach rise even higher, feels his cock throb pathetically. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol reaches forward, stretches his arm until his thumb touches Kyungsoo’s bottom lip, presses it inside, finding no resistance. Kyungsoo moans, wraps his tongue around the finger, insanely turned on by the raw power running through Chanyeol’s veins, manifesting through his thrusts, the way he bottoms out, his balls repeatedly hitting Kyungsoo’s ass. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo feels like he is being split open, like if Chanyeol fucks him any harder, he’ll seriously become concerned over his internal organs. </p><p> </p><p><em> “Please,” </em> Kyungsoo begs, his voice muffled by Chanyeol's thumb.</p><p> </p><p>The demon removes his finger, drags it purposefully down Kyungsoo’s bottom lip, making the soft lip bounce back. He grabs Kyungsoo’s jaw, tight, dominating. Meets his eyes. Smilies a dark smile. </p><p> </p><p>“What are you begging for?” Chanyeol asks, mocking, borderline condescending.</p><p> </p><p><em> Oh, </em> Kyungsoo thinks; <em> this is new.  </em></p><p> </p><p>“I want your cock,” he replies, breath hitching, chest heaving. “I want you to cum inside of me.”</p><p> </p><p>“Do you think you deserve it?” Chanyeol’s voice is dark, heavy. </p><p> </p><p>“Yes,” Kyungsoo gasps without a second thought. And then he worries that Chanyeol will drag this out even more, and he’s down to try some sub/dom roleplay but it he doesn’t cum <em> soon– </em> “Wait– no, I–”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol tilts his head, stops thrusting and it makes everything <em> worse. </em> “Make up your mind.”</p><p> </p><p>“I–” Kyungsoo swallows, shallow, feels desperation run down his throat. “I just want to cum, please Chanyeol, I–”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol kisses Kyungsoo, presses his lips, slips his tongue in between plush lips, works him open, captures the whimper building up within Kyungsoo’s throat. Chanyeol tastes like desire and lovemaking in the dark. </p><p> </p><p>“Okay, okay,” Chanyeol exhales. He holds Kyungsoo’s eyes tenderly. “Next time,” he promises.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo breathes in anticipation.</p><p> </p><p>And then he chokes on a gasp. Chokes on the sensation of Chanyeol fucking into him, his building orgasm.</p><p> </p><p>And it builds and builds, threatening to tumble down, to burst within Kyungsoo. There is something hot coiling in his stomach, reaching all the right places, tightening more and more. Flames are licking at Kyungsoo's skin and he reaches for Chanyeol, colliding their bodies together. </p><p> </p><p>Every inch of Chanyeol’s body is raw with power, his hands on Kyungsoo’s hips, his waist, his back are strong, demanding in their presences. There’s a strange kind of freedom in Chanyeol’s touch, a terrifying vulnerability. </p><p> </p><p>And then, Kyungsoo cums. </p><p> </p><p>The pressure within him <em> snaps </em> and ropes of cum spill from his cock, hitting his stomach.</p><p> </p><p>“<em> Fuck </em>,” Chanyeol says impossibly deep, the hunger behind it intense. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo moans when Chanyeol pulls out completely, rim catching slightly. He’s scared for a moment that Chanyeol won’t cum inside, that he’ll break his promise. And then he’s flipped onto his hands and knees and the manner in which Chanyeol treats it like it was <em> nothing </em> , the <em> dominance </em>only added to his orgasimic bliss. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pushes his cock inside of Kyungsoo, fucks into him at a pace that is inhuman, and Kyungsoo is moving up and down, crying out, his limp cock is stirring. Chanyeol is making him feel it, want it again.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh <em> fuck </em> ,” Kyungsoo moans out loud. “Yes <em> there!” </em></p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol snaps his hips, fucks into Kyungsoo so hard it <em> hurts, god more more more </em>and then Chanyeol stops suddenly. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo thinks he might actually <em> cry. </em></p><p> </p><p>“You want me to cum in you, right?” Chanyeol breathes from above, hands gripping so fucking tight that Kyungsoo knows it’s going to leave behind marks. </p><p> </p><p>“Yes!” Kyungsoo nearly shouts, legs shaking, mind hazy and he’s never felt like this before, so overcome that he forgets himself. </p><p> </p><p>“Then beg for it, sweetheart.”</p><p>  </p><p>It takes Kyungsoo a moment. </p><p> </p><p>“<em> Please </em> ,” Kyungsoo begs, allows himself to be vulnerable, for Chanyeol to take control of the situation. “Please <em> fuck me </em>, I need your cum–” </p><p> </p><p>“Sorry,” Chanyeol murmurs, “<em> fuck </em> , we should explore this later, it’s so <em> hot </em>, teasing you like this but I don’t think I can hold out any longer.”</p><p> </p><p>“What–” but Kyungsoo never got a chance because Chanyeol slams into him, pushes his cock so deep within his walls that he can <em> feel </em>stars burst in his lungs. </p><p> </p><p>It’s as if Chanyeol has given into some animalistic instinct and he’s so rough, his hands are so rough, so firm, so fucking strong and tender. Kyungsoo’s half hard cock keeps rubbing against the bedsheets, and his arms shake for a moment before they give up on him. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo falls onto the bed, forehead pressing against the pillow and his breathing is harsh, defining and Chanyeol in his deep, rich voice says, “Wait a little more, can you do that for me, sweetheart?”</p><p> </p><p>But his continuous thrusts never gives Kyungsoo the chance to reply with something other than whimpers and moans. </p><p> </p><p> It doesn’t take long for Chanyeol to cum. </p><p> </p><p>The feeling of it is heavy, unbelievably grounding how Chanyeol’s cock presses deep and <em> stays </em> there. Like he doesn’t want any to spill out and it’s <em> hot </em>, it turns Kyungsoo on in a way that he never thought about before. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol’s hand reaches in between Kyungsoo’s legs, wraps his fingers around Kyungsoo’s cock.<em> Oh god </em> , Kyungsoo thinks, <em> I’m going to cum again.  </em></p><p> </p><p>It takes forever and no time at all before Kyungsoo is gasping Chanyeol’s name again, ropes of thick cum spilling underneath his stomach. It would have been embarrassing the amount of time he took to cum but the slow drag of Chanyeol’s pulling out of Kyungsoo takes over his thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo feels Chanyeol’s hands pushing his thighs apart and he bites back a moan at how much it <em> aches </em>. He knows his body is going to be really sore. </p><p> </p><p>There’s a finger circling his rim, gentle but slight pain still shoots up Kyungsoo’s spine. </p><p> </p><p>“Sorry,” Kyungoo hears from behind him. “I want to make sure nothing leaks out.”</p><p> </p><p>The lust shimmering underneath Kyungsoo’s skin trembles. </p><p> </p><p>A moment later, Chanyeol collapses next to Kyungsoo, causing them to bounce a little on the mattress. </p><p> </p><p>They stare at each other, chests heaving. Chanyeol reaches over, cups Kyungsoo’s jaw tenderly, flashing him a dimple or two. This moment feels so exhilarating, so momentous in a manner that he never knew was possible. He desperately wants to save it in his pocket and revisit it for the rest of his life.</p><p> </p><p>But Kyungsoo doesn’t know how to voice his feelings so he says the first thing that came to mind: “I feel so sticky.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol laughs, resonating deep in the moonlight. Kyungsoo’s heart does somersaults, struggling to keep itself together.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol does a gesture, one that Kyungsoo’s very familiar with and within a millisecond, the sheets underneath them are brand new, free of cum and sweat and Kyungsoo feels fresh out of the shower. There’s a warm bed sheet covering his lower body that smells comforting.</p><p> </p><p>The perks of dating a demon.</p><p> </p><p>“Are we dating now?” Kyungsoo asks, comfortable enough to not overanalyze things, to wonder if the content falling out of his lips will make Chanyeol turn away from him or judge him. </p><p> </p><p>This, Kyungsoo realizes, is what a healthy human relationship is. He feels safe. Confident. Absolutely loved.</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t know, are we?” Chanyeol respondes, cheeky, the corners of his eyes quirked up. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, trying to tuck in his tiny smile into a line. “You tell me.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol chuckles a little and his face looks so handsome and soft that Kyungsoo feels like he’s on the edge of sanity, on the edge of deciding whether or not his body can handle round two so quickly. </p><p> </p><p>“Well,” Chanyeol starts, voice deep, soothing Kyungsoo’s soul, filling in the dead space within him. “I love you. A lot. And you love me too right?”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo sinks his teeth onto his plush, swollen bottom lip. A playful feeling dances along his skin, performing up his spine. “You already know the answer to that.”</p><p> </p><p>“Then you already know the answer to your question,” Chanyeol responds easily. </p><p> </p><p>“I feel like–” Kyungsoo’s heart pounds, nervous. He hates it, there’s no reason to be nervous<em> . </em> “I think dating isn’t the right word.” His one, two of his fingers twitch with the urge to touch the bare, golden skin in front of him. “It feels… fleeting. Not strong enough.”</p><p> </p><p>“Are you proposing marriage, Soo?” Chanyeol says, his voice light, his eyes playful and so very pretty.</p><p> </p><p>“I–” There are letters and vowels stuck in Kyungsoo’s throat but rose petals manage to squeeze by them and dance on top of his cheeks. “We <em> could– </em> I wouldn’t be opposed to it.”</p><p> </p><p>There’s something in Chanyeol's eyes, an intense emotional shift and then there is a strong hand gently molding against Kyungsoo’s face. The feeling of being in between soft, silk pillows and a firm, almost possessive touch nearly had Kyungsoo gasping. </p><p> </p><p>“I wouldn’t be opposed either,” Chanyeol tells him, deep, eyes holding something so heavy that Kyungsoo’s heart cracks underneath his gaze. “But what if–” He struggles and concern runs up Kyungsoo’s spine. “What if you change your mind?” </p><p> </p><p>“What do you mean?” Kyungsoo asks with an edge to his voice, the lines of his body tense. “I’m not going to change my mind, Chanyeol.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol exhales heavily and he gently caresses the corner of  Kyungsoo’s bottom lip. Kyungsoo knows it’s meant to feel comforting but it only makes him anxious. “We’re bound to each other for eternity.”</p><p> </p><p>“I know,” Kyungsoo’s voice is soft, the anxious pounding in his chest isn’t. “Just tell me what you’re trying to say, Yeol.”</p><p> </p><p>“What I’m saying is,” Chanyeol works his jaw and there’s a deep sadness in his eyes that Kyungsoo was not expecting. “I don’t want you to think we have to do <em> anything </em> alright? If you,” Chanyeol exhales a little shaky, “fall out of love with me or want to see someone else, it’s okay. Just because we’re bound to each other doesn’t mean we <em> have </em> to be together.” </p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“Okay,” Kyungsoo responds tentatively. “But I really, really doubt I’ll change my mind about us.” He slides his arm from underneath the sheets, presses his hand against Chanyeol’s jaw and he sincerely hopes the fondness and adoration fluttering against his chest is visible. </p><p> </p><p>Still, there is some doubt in Chanyeol’s eyes and Kyungsoo doesn’t like it. He doesn’t like how it makes him insecure, makes him think about a scenario in which <em> Chanyeol </em> is the one who no longer wants to be with Kyungsoo.</p><p> </p><p>And so he asks, jokingly, “Is this your subtle way of saying you love me but don’t want to be exclusive?” </p><p> </p><p>There’s a tight feeling in Kyungsoo’s chest. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pushes his eyebrows together with the definite feeling of concern. “Where did you get that idea?”</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t know.” Kyungsoo murmurs, “Where did you get the idea that I wouldn’t want you anymore?” He stretches his fingers enough to be able to intertwine them with pink hair. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol stares at Kyungsoo, as if he didn’t have the answer either and it makes Kyungsoo feel better. It reassurances him that Chanyeol isn’t thinking of leaving him and he shouldn’t feel the need to be reassured, especially after the vulnerable sex they just had. Where Chanyeol made it a point to show how much he adores Kyungsoo. </p><p> </p><p>“I guess, we should stop assuming things, huh?” Chanyeol asks, his voice lifts upward in a manner that’s supposed to make the situation light again. Kyungsoo thinks it’s cute.</p><p> </p><p>And maybe one day he’ll get to the point where he’s self assured enough to not have any doubts or fears. That would be nice. For now, Chanyeol’s reassurance is all Kyungsoo needs to feel luminous in the darkness. </p><p> </p><p>“We should,” Kyungsoo murmurs, and he shifts forward, feeling the slight creases of the bed sheets against his bare skin, keeping him grounded along with Chanyeol’s hand on his cheek. Chnayeol lifts himself up slightly, tilts his head to the side and presses a gentle kiss to Kyungsoo’s lips. </p><p> </p><p>Butterflies and bubbles have taken over Kyungsoo’s body and when Chanyeol’s tongue slides into his pilant mouth, the rose petals on his cheeks dance.</p><p> </p><p>They make out for a bit, unrushed, sweet and tender. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol manages to hold Kyungsoo’s face in between both of his hands and Kyungsoo absolutely loves it. Chanyeol’s hands, his strength, the intensity with which he sucks Kyungsoo’s tongue and lips, working Kyungsoo open–</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo touches Chanyeol as much as he can, flirts his fingers along the hard lines of Chanyeol’s jaw, his collar bones, slides his palms the broad, strong chest, pressing in desperation and the feelings stars feel when they see the sun. Tasting Chanyeol, touching Chanyeol sends wild tremors throughout Kyungsoo’s body, leaving behind giddiness. Leaving behind the feeling of pure affection.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pulls back slightly, lips wet and he rasps out, “I love you so fucking much,” and he preses their lips together again, soft, closed mouthed. Then his tongue slides in between Kyungsoo’s lips, warm, confident and Kyungsoo will never, ever get used to this warm, dizzy feeling consuming him. </p><p> </p><p>And a thought occurs to Kyungsoo, just as his tongue touches Chanyeol’s and a stimulating jolt echoes throughout his body.</p><p> </p><p>Will Chanyeol still take Kyungsoo’s soul?</p><p> </p><p>The kissing became more intense, Chanyeol’s teeth catches Kyungsoo’s bottom lip for a second and he’s pulling Kyungsoo closer but–</p><p> </p><p>The question keeps nagging Kyungsoo, unbearably inconvenient at this moment but he needs to know.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo pulls away, words already scrambling to his mouth, filling up the spaces where Chanyeol’s tongue had been. Chanyeol’s eyes, blue and white, took a moment to focus. Two question marks.</p><p> </p><p>“Chan,” Kyungsoo fears his voice will tremble as it shapes around his concerns, “are you really going to take my soul away?”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol is quiet. </p><p> </p><p>His handsome features, his eyes, eyebrows, the corner of his mouth became tight, trapped into place by Kyungsoo’s heavy question. The lack of answers worries Kyungsoo, it makes his heart dive deep into his stomach, tearing apart his lungs on the way down. </p><p> </p><p>“Yeah.” Chanyeol replies with finality, with the heaviness of a star's last breath. The feeling in Kyungsoo’s lungs wasn’t as poetic.</p><p> </p><p>And then there are arms around Kyungsoo, strong, pressing his naked body against Chanyeol's in an act of comfort but Kyungsoo feels none. He wants to though, so desperately but the confirmation of that single word feels like bricks filled with dread are on top of him, suffocating.</p><p> </p><p>“I’ll take care of you,” Chanyeol breathes into Kyungsoo’s hair, the words settling on the red marks on his throat, his jawline, just underneath his collarbones. “I swear, Soo. I’ll make sure nothing happens to you here and–” There’s a slight hesitancy that fills Kyungsoo body up, causing his insides to become inverted and upside down. “–and in Inferno as well, when it’s time for you to leave from here.”</p><p> </p><p>“You mean when I die.” Kyungsoo says, quiet but the words are so heavy that if he moves even an inch, his body will break apart. </p><p> </p><p>Arms tighten around Kyungsoo. “Yes,” Chanyeol tells him. “When you die.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m scared.” Kyungsoo whispers, vulnerable. </p><p> </p><p>He’s made up of nothing but dread and he wonders how he can make time stand still. He’s always wanted to make time stand still for moments that included Chanyeol and his smiles and his laughs but now Kyungsoo realizes that if time stands still nothing can go wrong. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Chanyeol utters and there’s pain in his voice. Shame. </p><p> </p><p>It doesn’t sit well with Kyungsoo and so he pulls away, he wants to see Chanyeol, he wants to see his face. </p><p> </p><p>“Yeol, it’s not your fault please don’t–” Kyungsoo takes in a tight breath, so overwhelmed from the sight of Chanyeol’s pain and he desperately wants to get rid of it. “Chanyeol it’s okay, please don’t– don’t blame yourself. It’s <em> my </em> fault and–” Kyungsoo doesn’t know what else to say, he’s not good with words and he really, really hopes that Chanyeol can feel what Kyungsoo is feeling right now. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol’s pained expression doesn’t go away and he looks as if he’s struggling to swallow back tears. Kyungsoo’s heart physically <em> aches </em>. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m really sorry, Soo.” Chanyeol tells him, his deep voice tight and it’s difficult for Kyungsoo to hear him like this. “I tried to save you, I really did but nothing <em> worked. </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo stills. “What do you mean?”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol's eyes become dark with memories. It worries Kyungsoo, wonders if Chanyeol got hurt or if he’s in any sort of trouble, his own pain, his own concerns easily pushed aside. </p><p> </p><p>“I tried talking to Lucifer, asked if there was something else I could do in exchange for your safety. Or a spot in up there.” Kyungsoo has a pretty good idea about what <em> up there </em> refers to and he isn’t quite sure what to feel. Isn’t sure if he has any room to feel something other than concern for the man laying in front of him, whose arms are still wrapped around him.</p><p> </p><p>“He asked me why I cared so much,” Chanyeol breaks eye contact and Kyungsoo can see the tightening of his strong jawline in the moonlight. “And when I said it’s because I love you, he laughed.”</p><p> </p><p>“Did he hurt you?” Kyungsoo asks, fighting to keep his voice from rising. There’s vicious anger in the pit of his stomach.</p><p> </p><p>“No,” Chanyeol says softly. “But I would have much rather received a punishment if it guaranteed your freedom.”</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t say that.” The seriousness in Chanyeol’s voice is very concerning. Kyungsoo doesn’t like the idea of Chanyeol risking himself for <em> him. </em> It’s unfair and– and it could be seen as an ultimate show of love but Kyungsoo would never, ever forgive himself if something happened to Chanyeol. </p><p> </p><p>“It’s the truth,” Chanyeol says, just as serious, firm and resolved. “I would do anything for you, Kyungsoo.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s breath comes out shaky and the harsh jerking of his heart is making it really hard to string thoughts, words, feelings together into a sentence. And there’s so much he can say, so much he <em> should </em> say but his mechanism kicks in. “I think I would still go to Hell, even if I hadn’t summoned you.”</p><p> </p><p>It’s a very, very shitty joke. It can’t even be called one.</p><p> </p><p>“You wouldn’t.” Chanyeol says immediately, sure. “You’re too good for Hell.”</p><p> </p><p>“But I like men,” Kyungsoo points out, glad to change the subject for a bit. He doesn’t quite know how to comfort but he hopes Chanyeol can get a break from his unnecessary guilt.</p><p> </p><p>“I know.” Chanyeol says, in a manner that’s playful, flirty, nothing like how he was previously. </p><p> </p><p>He’s taking Kyungsoo’s feelings into consideration. He understands how overwhelming the situation is becoming and Kyungsoo is really, really happy to have this man in his life. To be loved by him. </p><p> </p><p>“Of course <em> you </em> would know,” Kyungsoo responds dryly. </p><p> </p><p>He moves within Chanyeol’s embrace and Chanyeol removes his arms, scoots back, raising himself up a little. Kyungsoo sits up and stretches his arms above his head, stretching, feeling the tightness of his body, wonderfully sore. The bed sheet falls from his upper body, pools at his waist and he can feel Chanyeol’s gaze on him. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo glances at Chanyeol, noticing the familiar glint against his pretty heterochromia. There is relief in Kyungsoo’s lungs, he knows they’ll return to this subject but right now, he doesn’t want to think about it. </p><p> </p><p>It should be concerning how quickly he came to terms with his situation but knowing Chanyeol is going to be with him, protecting him, loving him, makes it bearable. Kyungsoo knows he shouldn’t be dependent on just one person but he doesn’t feel restricted or like he’s missing out on a million possibilities. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo likes the way he feels when he’s with Chanyeol. Like he can be himself around him, like he can do or say anything. He feels like an equal, valued and absolutely adored.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol reaches for Kyungsoo, eyes dark with want. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo moves out of the way, playfully with a stern expression. “I’m sore,” he pouts.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol grins, it’s crooked and boyish with dimples showing and it makes Kyungsoo’s heart stutter pathetically. He knows Chanyeol can hear it. </p><p> </p><p>“It’s okay,” Chanyeol says devastatingly low, placing his hand on Kyungsoo’s left side, his muscular arm cageing him in. He hovers above Kyungsoo, close, eyes flickering down and up, tainted with unrestrained desire. “I don’t mind doing all the work.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo swallows thousands of butterflies that settle deep within him, fluttering the rose petals in his lungs up to his cheeks. “Are you sure you aren’t an Incubus?”</p><p> </p><p>“Pretty sure,” Chanyeol mumbles before closing his eyes and pressing a kiss onto Kyungsoo’s full, swollen lips. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo closes his eyes as well, moaning when Chanyeol bites down on his lip, the tip of his tongue swiping down to soothe out the pain. He parts his mouth open and Chanyeol tastes like strength and fresh rain. His body presses closer, engulfing Kyungsoo, and there are large hands on his waist, pressing down what feels like a handful of suns into his skin. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s stomach growls. The heat travels from his cheeks to his ears from embarrassment. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pulls away, lips wet. “Are you hungry?”</p><p> </p><p>He doesn’t give Kyungsoo the opportunity to answer. Chanyeol’s pulling the sheets back, ready to get off the bed. The sight of broad shoulders rolling utterly destroys Kyungsoo’s thoughts. He struggles to push out words.</p><p> </p><p>“No, wait it’s fine!” Kyungsoo says, placing a hand on Chanyeol’s arm, shamelessly feeling his muscles. He doesn’t exactly know where this sudden clingy feeling came from. He wants to take it back, embarrassed for coming off as needy and wanting attention.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not that hungry,” Kyungsoo tries to explain. “A snack will be alright,” he trails off. </p><p> </p><p>“Okay let me grab you some granola bars,” Chanyeol replies.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo pouts. “Can’t you summon some? I’m too lazy to move.”  </p><p> </p><p>“Too bad,” Chanyeol tells him.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh wait!” Kyungsoo’s eyes widen. “I think there's some gummy bears under the bed!”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol’s eyebrows rise, like the sun whose rays are slowly leaking into the bedroom. “Really?” he asks, bending his upper body down towards the floor. The flawless and easy movement of Chanyeol’s back muscles is distracting.  </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol throws up a package in the air, catching it easily. He turns his body towards Kyungsoo again, moving more onto the bed. He looks down and frowns. “They’re not gummy bears, they’re lifesavers!” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, “They’re still gummies, so it’s the same thing.” Chanyeol pouts and Kyungsoo finds it hard to keep a natural face. “Pass me some, please.”</p><p> </p><p>“Wait, how long have they been there?” Chanyeol asks, turning the bright packaging around. He turns it upside down and stops, pretty eyes moving as he reads a label.  “Um, Soo these have been expired for two months now.” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo furrows his eyebrows. “That’s not a lot of time. I’m sure they’re still good, they weren’t even open.”</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t know…” Chanyeol trails off, pink hair framing his forehead as he continues to turn the bag of candies in his hand, inspecting it. </p><p> </p><p>“It’s not that big of a deal,” Kyungsoo says, reaching over and grabbing the bag. He turns it around and Chanyeol’s right, the candies expired about two months ago but it’s fine right? It’s not like they’ll drop dead. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo moves to open the plastic bag and Chanyeol’s hands shoot out, a “Wait, don't eat it!” falling out of his lips as he tries to snatch the lifesavers away. Kyungsoo moves away quickly, sitting up and crawling towards the other end of the bed, unbothered with his nakedness. His swinging dick did feel a little uncomfortable as it hit the inside of his thighs though.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m <em> hungry </em> .” Kyungsoo tells Chanyeol as he rips open the bag. He’s not <em> starving </em>, but watching Chanyeol freak out is too good to pass up. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo sticks his hand into the bag, making sure to avoid the orange ones. He’s about to pop the cherry flavored candy into his mouth when suddenly the lifesaver disappears from in between his fingers. </p><p> </p><p>“What the hell?” Kyungsoo says, wiggling his fingers around. He looks up to Chanyeol who is sitting in front of him, the bed sheet doing a horrible job of covering his dick. Not that Kyungsoo minds but the expression on Chanyeol’s face, his eyebrows straining across his face, chases away any lust. </p><p> </p><p>“Did you just get rid of my lifesaver?” Kyungsoo asks, disbelief bleeding into his voice. “Yeol, c’mon, I’m not going to fucking die, it’s just <em> candy. </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“You can’t be too careful,” Chanyeol mutters, his white and blue eyes unwavering in their stare as Kyungsoo grabs another candy.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m human, yes, but give my digestive system some credit.” Kyungsoo purposefully makes eye contact with Chanyeol and holds it, like when the moon passes by the sun and faces it for a minute or two. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo opens his mouth and tosses in the lifesaver, a green one this time. He chews it, carefully, still bridging the gap between him and Chanyeol with his gaze. “It’s a little dry and hard to chew,” he mutters, swirling around the gummy in his mouth. Maybe his saliva will give it a more soft texture. </p><p> </p><p>He forces himself to swallow. “See? Not bad.” Kyungsoo says as he reaches into the bag for another one, if only to prove a point. The gummy is stale and dry but he’s not about to let Chanyeol think he’s right.</p><p> </p><p>“That’s enough,” Chanyeol says as he reaches over and grabs the bag from Kyungsoo’s hands.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey!” Kyungsoo protests, swollen lips automatically forming into a pout. There was nothing harsh about the way Chanyeol took the candies, he did it gently, but <em> still </em>.</p><p> </p><p>“Come on, let’s go down stairs,” Chanyeol says as he tosses the bag of lifesavers onto the bed. “I’ll carry you.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol moves to wrap his arms around Kyungsoo but Kyungsoo places a hand on the hard, firm chest in front of him. The urge to pull down Chanyeol and kiss and maybe blow him off explodes within his chest. But Kyungsoo ignores it, there’s something wrong, he can sense it.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey,” Kyungsoo says gently, concern rising and settling on the lines of his face. “What’s wrong?”</p><p> </p><p>“It’s nothing.” Chanyeol looks away, ducks his head for a handful of seconds. When he looks up, there’s a small smile on his lips, hesitant, forced. “C’mon, you don’t have to help, you can just sit and admire me.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo knows what Chanyeol is trying to do and before, he would let it go. But it’s different now, they’re in a <em> relationship </em> and just as Chanyeol supports him, he wants to do the same. He wants to know what Chanyeol is feeling, wants Chanyeol to trust him and know that Kyungsoo will always be here to steady him. </p><p> </p><p>“You can tell me,” Kyungsoo says as his hand moves up to cup around Chanyeol’s neck, fingers sliding in between the pink hair, rubbing the spot just above his neck, hoping it brings some sort of comfort. “Tell me what’s bothering you.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol flicks his eyes up and Kyungsoo can see raw emotion in them and there’s a strong, heavy vulnerability within them that manages to snap the stars in half. He looks as if he’s holding back, scared that his words will scare Kyungsoo away. </p><p> </p><p>There’s a brief stillness in between them, a small moment where time looks away for a few seconds. </p><p> </p><p>Then, a deep, almost shaky, “I’m scared to lose you.” triggers time to move again.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo inhales. </p><p> </p><p>“You’re not going to lose me,” he says carefully. “Even when I die, I’ll still be with you.” He doesn’t quite know what Chanyeol means, doesn’t know where the worry is steaming from. But he’s desperate to know. </p><p> </p><p>“I know,” Chanyeol responds, the color in his eyes swaying. “But the thought of you dying and not having any peace afterwards–” He brings his hands up, molding them to the soft lines of Kyungsoo’s face, resting his thumb on the corner of Kyungsoo’s lips. </p><p> </p><p>“I don’t know,” he murmurs, his lips tight around those words. “Maybe I’m being too sensitive, you’re right it’s not like you’ll die from some expired candy but the fact that it’s going to <em> happen </em>–”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not scared of dying.” Kyungsoo tells Chanyeol and it feels strangely liberating to say it out loud. The words hang in the dim room long enough for the sun to breathe more light into the dark sky. “Because I know what’s waiting for me. Because I know you’ll take care of me.”</p><p> </p><p>“You don’t deserve this,” Chanyeol says and there's extraordinary sadness in his voice, in his eyes, the way his hands tighten. “You deserve to <em> live </em>.”</p><p> </p><p>“I am living,” Kyungsoo’s voice is soft, tender. “You’re not a burden Chanyeol, being tied to you isn’t a burden.”</p><p> </p><p> Kyungsoo wants to do so many things, he wants to lean in and kiss Chanyeol, wants to hold him, wants to reach out and touch his skin, touch his valleys and grooves and curves of his body. He wants to touch his <em> heart </em>. </p><p> </p><p>“I don’t think you realize,” Kyungsoo whispers, emotion strangling his voice, “how much you mean to me. But it’s okay.” </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo leans in, breathing and not breathing in the same motion. He breaks eye contact and glances down at Chanyeol’s lips. He glances back up to those pretty, sun kissed eyes. “I love you, Chanyeol,” he tells him as sure as the rising sun outside. “I love you so much.” </p><p> </p><p>And he kisses Chanyeol.</p><p> </p><p>Soft for the briefest of moments and then Chanyeol breathes into the kiss, and it comes stronger, more desperate, filled with beautiful vulnerability that melts into adoration and it travels down Kyungsoo's throat when Chanyeol works his mouth open, smooth, warm, soothing out the scars left behind from swallowing back tears and burdens and uncertainties for so long.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>“Are you sure you want to do this?” Chanyeol asks, struggling to stay still, to keep his hands from wandering up Kyungsoo’s bare chest. From pulling off Kyungsoo’s pants and underwear. He wants them off, he wants to press their bodies together, wants to hear whimpers fall out of those pretty lips. </p><p> </p><p>But he wants to make sure Kyungsoo wants that too. </p><p> </p><p>“Yes,” Kyungsoo replies, slightly annoyed obviously by the shift of his emotional energy. “Why do you keep asking?”</p><p> </p><p>“Because–” Chanyeol tries to ignore the gentle rising of Kyungsoo’s chest, of his perky nipples. “Because isn’t the first time supposed to be special?</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not a virgin,” Kyungsoo deadpans. </p><p> </p><p>“You’re a bottom virgin.” Chanyeol tells him. He realizes how ridiculous that sounds the second they’re pinned in the air between them. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo rolls his eyes. “It’s just sex.”</p><p> </p><p>But Chanyeol can feel it, the fear pulsating within Kyungsoo, the rushed, jerky pace of his heart. The way his hands are gripping the bed sheets too tightly. But Chanyeol knows Kyungsoo will never voice his fears and uncertainty. </p><p> </p><p>“Do you want me or not?” Kyungsoo sighs out, nonchalantly but not quite.  </p><p> </p><p><em> Yes. </em> Chanyeol thinks. <em> I want all of you. I want your heart. </em></p><p> </p><p>But it’s too soon to say things like that. It will scare Kyungsoo even more so Chanyeol moves one hand up, traces the gentle curve of Kyungsoo’s waist with his finger tips, let’s his eyes take in the colors of Kyungsoo’s eyes, the roundness of lips, the fullness of his eyebrows. The pain hiding behind those features.  </p><p> </p><p>“I’ll be gentle, I promise.” Chanyeol tells him, sincere and heavy. </p><p> </p><p>In the amount of time for the moon to show a different phase to the world, Kyungsoo blushes, red paint carefully spreading on top of his cheeks. Chanyeol hears the slight pick up in his heart beat.</p><p> </p><p> “Just hurry,” Kyungsoo mutters, looking away.</p><p> </p><p><em> Pretty, </em>Chanyeol thinks as he places a hand underneath Kyungsoo's thighs, pushing them upward, his other hand traveling down to settle on the buttons and zipper. </p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol means it, every word. He’ll be gentle with Kyungsoo and care for him and– </p><p> </p><p>And Chanyeol will love him. </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo deserves to be loved and hopefully, he’ll love Chanyeol back. </p><p><br/>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you so much for reading!</p><p>Find me on tw: @dohkiss ✨</p></blockquote></div></div>
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